Babyshambles

 Babycham

The Shambabies

Walked out of the factory

They said they were making champagne

But they were really making babies

Were they real?

Was it a knocking shop?

I tried to investigate

But I could only see men going in

And babies coming out

Where were the women?

You need them to make babies I thought

Were they the same men turned into babies?

Some kind of shrinking or 

Age reversal process

But no,

Their clothes wouldn't fit

And anyway

The same men came out again later - I checked it

So these truly were plastic babies

Shambabies, hidden

Behind a front of

Showerings

It all made sense now

The puzzle pieces started to fit together

They held baby showers in there

Parties-perhaps

They invited the mothers of Eastern Europe in there

Who brought their babies

And then somehow they were plastic coated

But no, it was more sinister than even that

They were Frankenstein babies

Created by scientists, marinated in cider

And then put out into the world

The new doll army of Shepton Mallet

But what was their purpose

These walking automatums

To take over from the adults?

The could never grow up

They would never grow old

Would they simply stay

To look after the world

Be the next and final generation of humans

No more after that

A garden of Eden tended by plastic babies

Paradise - or so they thought

And their leader?

They had none, none that I was aware of

All of a sudden I looked up and saw in the bushes

Stalking next to the factory

Like a giant guard dog

The yellow neck and disney head of 

Lead Babychammer herself

The Babycham Bambi

Its big blue bow tie rushing the branches out the way as it went

Was it grazing I thought

It looked more magesterial, and queen like

In the early dusk it surveyed its grounds

And looked down onto the court yard

Where the army of babies was lining up

In regimental fashion

After the last of the yellow babies had assembled

The Bambi spoke

Goo gaa, gaga, googa gaga

Duke google and Lady Gaga

Walked out into the throng

Duke Google - I see now that is how he has controlled

The babies

And Lady Gaga has sung them songs

To keep them motivated

And in her meat dress she sang one now

Gaga gaga it went, and goo goo

And Duke Google said Google Google

Goggle, goggle, goo, goo gaga 

And the babies seemed to know and understand

Exactly what was being said to them

Luckily I had my baby translator app

On my google watch I had just bought

And it translated for me - 

Go forth in Shepton Mallet

Kill the shop keepers

Take over the shops

Like cuckoos

Replace the real babies in the families

And push those out into the night

We will take them back here into the factory

and they will learn the ways of Showerings

We will train them to make cider

And they will be our slaves

The parents will have to look after you

All the days of their lives

Even into old age

For you will never grow old

And any people who

Think of having babies after that

Will be thought of as mad

And the human race

Will cease to ruin the planet

For all the animals

Like the does and the deer