It was the third party I went to
And I really wasn't insured
For fire theft and damage
Oh I really can't get bored
First a man blew up the kettle
Next the water mains burst
Then I saw a rusted piece of metal
But it was gold of course
The lady had left her jewellery out
Well what a dope I thought
It surprised me not
When I heard the shot
And knew I had been caught
I was the thief at the party
I was the fire starter
I was the sod, the act of God
My blood was what caused the flood
Insure me if you like
I'm going to prison for stealing a bike
There is not much you can untie
From a story made of knots
