Looking glass

 I went into nature to see the birds

But all I saw were the crowds of people

So I went to the city to see the steeples

But all I saw were Empty streets

I went to the moon to look at the stars

But all I saw were parked up Tesla cars

So I went to the stars to see the universe

But all I saw was infinity run in reverse

So I went within to find myself

But all I saw were others reflected there

So I asked the others what can they see

They said behind the mirror they could see me

The story of two monks

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the pages would dry

Well now brother my heart rests on the book that you have left behind

Put your vest back on, take up your oars go back for my book you must find

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the sea gulls would cry

Oh father Cadoc how could I ever

Have forgotten the book of your pride

Just don't make me go out on the water

I am exhausted and the sunlight has nearly died

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the mages would sigh

Now then Baruc you will serve your master?

Make your way down to the water side

There is still light and you can avoid disaster

Return to me my book, before the ink on my page has dried

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the pages would fly

And he left his quill in the ink well

And in the quill the ink did rise

And when his pen was full he put its tip to paper

And he continued to write his next lines

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But you must read between the lines

And so Baruc went back out on the water

In his sweat and the tears that he cried

For he was more than wet from the river

And with a shiver set back out on the tide

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But you must read between the lines

And brother Baruc went into the water

He pushed his boat out into the tide

And he fought the storm that ravaged each quarter

And he fought the thought that he might surely die

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the soothsayers would sigh

Oh master, my master, why have you forsaken me

These 8 miles I row for your pride

I pray to God the sea serpents won't awaken seas

And drag me down where the river bed lies

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But by the morning the wagers would lie

After many long hours of rowing his river boat reached Flatholm's side

And he staggered up to the hermit's hovel and returned with a book in his hand

Oh curse this old book and its pages, I curse this book of his pride

And he thirst for water for ages, but he set out in his boat for Barry's land

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the driftwood would dry

And the darkness drifted all around him

The moon was beginning to hide

Yet his oars kissed the waves that would not drown him

Except for the cursed book by his side

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

And in the morning his mother would cry

And upon the horizon a white squall was gathering

Then lightning split and he was swallowed inside

The blown sea fog, and wind waves were lathering

That whipped up the sea's grog to infernal chide

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the sages would cry

In a sudden swell the book fell far into the stern

And Baruc reached down to gather it

But the sea dogs wave did slather and spit

And in a snarling bite snatched away his free oar

And as he hugged Cadoc's book to his chest

His boat was rocked and spun asunder

In the thrashing maelstrom and thunder

And overturned the book went under

But bobbed up on the otherside

Oh father, father your book was harder

To hook than my journey to paradise

And I lose faith that in my task I am a failure

But in my heart I know God must be on my side

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But the notes in the margins would dry

And Baruc clung to the keel, with Cadog's book his achilles heel

And he could begin to feel numb cold seeping into his limbs

And through the outrageous winds he held the book fast

And fastened it with bowline strings to the hull

But time and tide wait for no man, 

And soon seawater had filled his lungs by the brimful 

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the gulls would cry

While Baruc was drowning, Cadog was frowning

The wind was blowing a gale outside

But he kept on writing, with his candle flame fighting

The storms breath breathing as his ink it dried

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But in the morning the wreckages would testify

When finally the dawn broke in the morning

St Cadog saw Baruc's body afloat on the tide

And he went down to see the ship wreck, the flotsam and jetsam

He said a prayer, salvaged his book and then went back inside

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But by the morning the pages would dry

Baruc's body was buried in a tomb on Barry island

And St Cadog went back to his hermitage on the Flatholm side

And as Cadoc read his tombe on Flatholm island

He thought the only thing that's true was that the Word had never died

They said he was book bound,

And that he was bound to die

They said he was book bound

But now ink on the pages has dried

B and Q and your eyes so blue

 I went into B and Q

And thought I recognized you

But I walked past and just looked in your eyes that smile

And I followed my master

Like a dog sniffs disaster

And took a right in the gardening aisle

These green machines were doing nothing for me

So I sauntered along to cements

Feeling heavier there than when I came in

I suddenly realized what gravity meant

And you and your green eyes

Oh they could have been blue

You and your eyes so Blue

Standing in the entrance to B and Q

Well I padded on down to the show room

Where the kitchen cabinets leant

I pulled out a draw just like a show groom

Who was trained to advertize kitchen equipment

But it was there I felt myself grow older

When I felt a tap on my shoulder

And in its cold grasp, I thought with a rasp

This must be my final judgement

But it was only Armitage Shanks

It was only a blast from the past

It was a chrome sea horse

Who reared up like Napolean riding a dwarf monument

And I knew exactly what it all meant

Oh and you with your eyes so Blue

Still stood in the entrance to BandQ

And gave me a glance, and I thought here's my chance

I must seize the carpe dieum day

And I had a light bulb moment

And swung right down the carpet way

But as I felt the piles, the tall and the short

I thought well if this was a flying carpet

Then Aladdin is a good sport

For I would be reaching for the futon or the duvet

Because these would be a pain in my ass anyway

Oh but you with your eyes to blue

Were still standing in the entrance to B and Q

Still on next left was the lighting

And I remembered I needed a bulb for a lamp

And it was bright too bright for the sighting

While outside it was so cold, wet and damp

And yet I bought the bulb it was E27 

And it cost me all of five pounds

Five pounds a guy said, that light bulbs gone to your head

No its filament is a good buy on environmental grounds I said

in reply, as if I knew exactly what it all meant

Oh and you with your Eyes so Blue

Were just about still standing at the entrance to B and Q

And finally when I'd bought my Bulb and left the queue

I walked over to you and said hey I think I recognize your face

But you didn't take your mask off to my surprise

So I said well actually I think I recognize your eyes

Oh you with your eyes so blue

Standing in the entrance to B and Q

And you said I used to work on the tills at Smile

Oh I said that's it, the one at the top of wind mill hill?

And you said yes that's right, and then I said hmm hum

Well I'll see you later, you know and I left a bread crumb

And you picked it up and your eyes they smiled

You said see you later alligator, I said in a while crocodile

And I thought how long can this awkward scene go on

Becuase one of us has to leave soon and you work here

So I guess it will have to be me

So I said bye

And I walked away onto the rainy night pavement

As if I knew exactly what it all meant

And Oh you with your eyes so blue

were no longer standing in the entrance to B and Q

When I had to come back 45 minutes later

And get a refund on my light bulb,

because in Tescos it was four pounds cheaper

And I felt in B and Q it was oversold 

So I said you with your eyes so blue

You've probably finished your shift at B and Q

and gone back home, well at least I saved

money honey on my environmentally friendly lightbulb 

And then I stand in the rain outside B and Q 

And I cry why, why God why? Why you?

With your eyes so blue, can go and give me so much pain

Yeah you, with your eyes so blue

I wanna cry out your name, but I never asked

Oh you in the entrance to B and Q

Why did you never take off your mask?

The travelling soul

In the hotel lobby, down the old country road

They say how are you Bobby? Be gone by the time the cock crows

 Well travelling is my hobby, by them it's well knowed

For it's alright by me, I have no fixed abode

No fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

Through this old lobby, where the cold wind blows

I'm not searchin' for diamonds, not searchin' for gold

I have no place to hide them, I have no fixed abode

There's a sign in the night stars, my true path I am showed

To listen to night jars that sing in hedgerows

And if what they sing of is iron bars which the caged bird knows

Well I'd rather breathe the free air and have no fixed abode

I hear them calling softly, down the old country road

They call to me often, where the sweet waters flowed

Where the lakes are like mirrors, and the sky is rain-bowed

And the shadows of my mistakes, they weigh a lighter load

For in the give and the take, they leave me no fixed abode

No fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

I walk past my old college, where my friends and I strode

It's a path I walked often down a long memory road

And I look to them for answers, but now they speak a foreign code

They say the past's walls are like a prison, instead try livin' 

at no fixed abode

no fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

It's a house on the hill, It's an mirage I am told 

But in its pursuit I am willing to give up pieces of gold

For all things time touches, it will bring into its fold

Like the beggar on wooden crutches who has no fixed abode

But the beggar is still a king, so long as promises aren't sold

And the king is but beggar if his dreams are only of gold

It's the place that time kills, but its road will lead to hell

I don't know if it be God's will to keep me sheltered well

But in my heart I am still, though its beating does tell

That I am afraid still to have no fixed abode

no fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

It's a face in the crowd, and a case in a court

Yes it's a man who once was proud, but now amounts to nought

It's a bitter taste in the mouth, after drinking sea salt

Its a soul in a river, washed out to sea

So he must be a sailor or King fisher, or else all a quiver he will be

He'll get the sea sickness, and he'll long for his home

But that would be a wickedness, for there is none, he's all alone

He has no fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

They say yes he was one I once knew well, now time's have past

And it's like looking down a well

And I look for my future but only hear my own echo

Calling don't put away your suitcase for you'll have no fixed abode

no fixed, no fixed,

No fixed abode

The address where I leave my hat

Is at no fixed abode

No light to guide me, but the light of the road

The address that I live at, is no fixed abode

No fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

The home where I'm living

Is named No fixed abode

I go where I'm getting,

And I get there alone

No two cents to rub together

There's no blood from the stone

If you take what I'm giving

Then you'll get what you're owed

Just come and find me

I'll be at no fixed abode

No fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

I'll meet you at the sign posts upon the crossroads

You go your way as I heard the cock thrice crowed

I'm going my way in the direction of no fixed abode

Now Jesus was a traveller, at least that's what I'm told

He walked many miles down the line which he toed

And there were few that followed him, but some who he rowed

Then he walked upon the water but had no fixed abode

Is it better to be travelling, than that you should arrive?

Well the way is unravelling, but I'm still alive

And I'll get where I'm going, in the end I'll get what I'm owed

When you see the rainbow glowing,  at no fixed abode

No fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

Will you buy what I'm selling?, well they call it paradise

And there is no there telling you, open your eyes

For the train is at the station, and so you better climb aboard

But you'll never reach your destination, at no fixed abode

At no fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

The mountains are rising, like suns in your eyes

And I see by your story, that hard travelling has its price

But we'll know in the glory that the road will entice

So be where you are going at no fixed abode

no fixed, no fixed, no fixed abode

Octopus complex

 I've got an octopus complex

I want to have 8 arms

And be able to feel

The things that I feel

I'm sure I can come to no harm

I've got the octopus complex, doctor

It came from my mother who was an actor

She over dramatized events

Like when we went camping it got too intense

I spent the next 8 days in bed

That's how I ended up with an octopus in my head

I've got the octopus complex something bad

In fact I think you can blame it on my dad

He spent every penny he ever had

On making me as many enemies, so sad

And now I can only keep 8 friends in the world

Well I should have had the oyster complex

And fallen in love with a pearl

I've got the octopus complex, and I wish I didn't bother

But it all started out with the birth of my brother

Ever since then, I've wanted to control other men

And it's left me with this feeling I must control them

So I became an octopus teacher, but it turned out I was more of a preacher

And told them God was an Octopus, and man was only a creature

I've got an octopus complex and I blame it on my sister

She was born 8 years before me, and each year is like step on ladder that leaves

Poor me

On the bottom rung, always trying to climb up

So I become an octopus and then I can drink tea from a cup

And sip soup from a spoon and eventually I'll run for president

But probably not until next June

I've got an octopus complex, where I think I am a man

When actually I'm an octopus just tryin' to do what I can

And it's hard tryn'to juggle life work and money

Mix in with that bills and loans then things ain't so funny

Well it's lucky I've got 8 hands to handle all the telephones

But only one mouth to speak from when I'm on my own

Yes I'm an octopus I must confess, that's why you've found

Lobster claws in my draws and shell fish in my stationary

They are only snacks, that they don't serve at Greggs

And it's been hard tryin' not to over satisfy my woman in bed

There are many things an octopus can do better than a man

But thinking himself something better than the rest of us

Takes an octopus man

I've got an octopus complex, I want to shake every hand

And greet every low down as if he's a great man

But when it comes to the over compensating attention

When I leave a group of people I squirt ink in their direction

How to make friends and influence people

Just come to my church hear me preach

Under the Octopus steeple

In the museum of modern love

Well I am walking in the museum of modern love

I am talking in the museum of modern love

In the museum of modern love

Well I am all alone in the shadows

I am all alone in the dark

In the museum of modern love

Where cattle are calling and bees are buzzing

Down the walls of the palisade

In the museum of modern love

In the museum of modern love

Where our hearts are art on display

And they are kept inside glass cabinets

Waiting for a visitor to pay

To see them in the museum of modern love

In the museum of modern love

You can see them, you can look but do not touch them

Yes you can see them every day

And the liars/Lyres are calling in the shadows of the walls

And cherubims are singing as their plaster friezes fall

From the museum of modern of love

Where the paintings are hung down the darkened halls

And the thunderbolts of ancient Gods

Crack and splinter the backs of winter wonder statues

And the pairs of footless shoes, and handless gloves

Stand or lie on plinths where majestic black horses trod

In the museum of modern love

In the museum of modern love

Venus has grown back her arms

And she is in the arms of Mars

Who's stolen hearts and cars

And the policewoman is throwing

Off her uniform

And Mr Universe is looking at David's statue

Like he is no good at sport

As if love is just pumping blood

Through an Iron heart

In the museum of modern love

And the curator is pulling down the curtains

Crying let the light shine in

And the dust particles settle on the quantum heart

Who says am I here or am I not?

Am I the air or the arrow shot?

Am I a wave or am I a dart?

In the museum of modern love

And so take your ticket and come on in

But keep your coat on, for the cold gets in

And the men falter, and the women win

In the museum of modern love

Where Picasso's poltergeist is thin

And slips between the paper leaves of the magazines

That are left on table tops in the gift shop

Where you can buy back a postcard of your heart

On your way out of the museum of modern love

Give them a flitch of Bacon

 Give them a flitch of bacon, ya hear

And send them on their way

They've been married for a whole year 

And they wouldn't take back a day

Carry them aloft our shoulder

They are young but will grow older

And as they say

Give them and inch and they take a mile

Oh give them a flitch today

Give them a fllitch of bacon I told yer

Put it on top and carry them all over

Town and sing out, raise merry shout

Give them a flitch today

If they've got a flitch, they won't scratch that itch

So give them a flitch today

Toad

 It's six o'clock in the morning and the church bell is beginning to toll

The towns folk are starting to get up somewhere between the yellow

musk of street light and their first coffee cup they are reborn

And I turn to you and ask are we what we were once?

And you look askance and say the heroes are in us

And they run out of the page, through drawings on the stage

And I must ask what is this age, but kettles and fans that switch on

And electronic devices, which never suffices our needs, our wants

Where is the human intimacy, where is the human touch?

And you turn to me in your sleep and say why must you ask for so much?

And there is something courageous about the act of rising

Something that habit gives the human and it can be surprising

How automatic, as a rabbit, wakes and leaves his tunnel

We all must stir outside our door down the street side funnel

Somehow the bell demands, in a deep sub-conscious seat

Where we obey a call to arms to protect and serve on our feet

We all must be standing in order to carry on

And though our road may be demanding we can hear our victory song

So stirring, rousing, rebelling we go, defying all the odds

Defiantly defeating, all the squandered times repeating

The capricious acts of the Gods

Yet with our feet we give thanks, to cows and fields and cowpats

And mud, and stone walls that define the boundary lines

Across which we call dogs and cats

And men with umbrellas and women in hats

Rain on the fellas and gals 

The boys and the girls in wellies

That splash

And so long as this can carry on

Then Wells can too

And I will wake to take to the road

And send up my prayers of thanks

To the toad with the lily wet flanks

Who sits like Buddha in the wayside

Before he crawls back under his stone

Hawk Talk

 Well it needed to happen, that is for sure

The eagle has flown

But there's blood at his door

And as he does roam

There's the rub I am poor

But rich to have a home in The old Silvermore

The kestrel flew down to my hand

But quickly I saw he was a friend

And we talked like two hawks

Of life and our work 

As we walked out over paths wend

And the places we knew were many

In the hearts chapters we dropped a penny

Down the well of memory

To hear it echo what you meant to me

And I can hear your voice still

Ringing through the years

And she flew like a siren call

Like a screech through blood boiling skies

And it took a wrecking ball

To knock down all the cloud castles where I lie

And if there is some bird I must let fly

It is that of your ghost

Feather bed where I lie

Make a nest for my last post

But I cannot accept that I quit

Through this artificial bull shit

For Brexit is a lie, the truth is goodbye

Is hardest to say when you really mean it

Making Hay

 Are you going to ret and scutch?

Are you going to build and bind?

Are you going beat them?

And will you flatten the threads of the flaxen kind?

Do you need an old thermometer?

To break the bridge of the old geometer.

Who is measuring his toes.

While the grass grows

Under his feet - it's a vomiter

 

Have you sawn the hill in two?

Have you toed the line?

Have you sown the seeds two by two

Crossing country with the country wine?

 

Is it a stain in your pocket?

Is it a thread of your cloak?

Will it pull south if you dead head it?

Who is getting your goat?

 

Oh, the pheasant beaters know it

Yes, they howl, and they grown

When the pheasants they show it

Bear their bleating breast like a crone

 

And ringing through the trees

Goes the shotguns report

Staggering to my knees

I clutch and I moan at the sport

 

And yes, I retch 

when I see the flak in the vetch

And I feel a pea through my sleep

Though my bed is six mattresses deep

 

So, will you ret it, for one more year?

For one more time

Will you scutch and bleed, and tear at the reed?

Will you beat it? Can you ever beat time?

 

But the hands that rock the cradle

are the hands that hold the plough

And some like Cain's on Abel's

Were blood stained after breaking a vow

 

And the lines on the palm of the peasant

Are like the streaks in feathers of a pheasant

They are red and brown, and deep and proud

Like his furrowed brow, under sleeping clouds

 

And what will we make with the flax fibres

Roll them and mat them in to webbed spiders

That cling and they brook their tenuous hooks

And settle in new arrangements their atoms

 

And lattices and matrices 

That mother nature's intricacies

Have patterned

And pat them like patter-cakes, break them and flatten

Them down

Like tortoise shells hunkered

Like the dense pellets of owls

The egg yolks that bind the albumin

In the year's photo albums

And the favourite jokes of friendship

That sadden when they've gone

Oh, make the ties that bind

As strong 

River out of Eden

I was running up the riverbed dry

She was naked lying in her bed

Her stones had not bled, and she could not cry

Her dress of water was locked in store

And she was cold lying on the floor

 

I ran up the Biddle combe brook

And it gave to me a sideways look

Who are you to trample on my bones?

Can't you see I lie alone

 

I need no other to claim my throne

Or cast about my care-worn stones

I am nature the mother grown

But no other shall me own

 

And in ripples and in childish tides

Her water dress trickled down over her thighs

And filled the dry bed where once she was wed

With its web-locked fingers, and its fluidity spread

And curled in crispness of a fresh salad bed

 

And I leapt like a monkey out of her flow

Her water cress dress would have swallowed me whole

In her water-caress I was a fungi

And I could listen to her glamorous story

Glistening soft as a velvet Jew’s ear

Of how she joined the Gulf stream

To travel away for a year

 

But she returned in the rain clouds

Heavy and all out of sorts

He had left her near the Isle of Iona 

For a Madagascan or Chilean sport

 

So she returned to her hilly spring 

She dressed herself in black,

And she lay in ground waters low in the basin

Of the Mendip hill's cavernous crack

 

She stayed like a widow in mourning 

She lay in a suicide pact

With the stalactites and stalagmites adorning

Her chamber of echoing fact

She called to her own deep reflection

And she spoke with the mirror of the cave

And it said you are the source on inspection

It is only from you we can make waves

 

So, go out into the world once again

When the cold air will not turn you to ice

And be like the river of Eden

That runs out through paradise

A million lives

 I've lived a million lives

I've come and gone

over fires and coals

And my feet have moved swiftly along

As deep sea shoals

I've lived a million lives that's me

I've been to Burundi

And Margate on sea

I've sold the souls

And I know that nothing is free

And we pay the price

For the lives we lead

I've lived a million lives

And stole a thousand dolls

And sold the drugs kept under rugs

That have wrapped up things for me

I've been sacked and I've been fired

I've been quacked up in midnight choirs

And walked on cracked ice

So I know the price

Of the life I lead

I've lived a million lives

They're like the stars of the sky

Had so many women, been in too many bars

I've jacked cars, and I've jack-knifed

And I've been the jack of hearts

So I can say I know the price

Of living this life

I've lived a million lives

And walked a thousand trails

And each one of them has cost me twice

For each time I win, in another way I fail

And you lose what you had to begin with

If you're a gambler, if you're a thief

But I ask you who is the greater conman

The king or the priest?

Do they both know the price of the lives they lead?

And we each move our pieces across the chess board

The Rook to the Bishop

The Knight to the Pawn

The King and the Queen are mutually torn

But do they each know the price of the life

To which they're born

I've lived a million lives that's me

You don't have to ask me twice

I know not much is free

Except this advice which I impart to thee

Please know the price of the life

You lead

Wood for the Trees

I can't see the wood for the trees

Not me,

Oh, I look in the brook

But it comes up to my knees

Well what do I need?

 

You need to look through the forest he said

Listen, how far does the dog run into the wood?

I said, I don't know, he said good

You see he runs halfway, because

He can only run halfway into the wood

Before he starts running out of the wood

You see?

Not really -

Well that is why you can't see the wood for the trees

You are focusing on the problem and not the solution

You have to look through the gaps between the trees

To see the other side

If that is where you want to go,

How are you going to get there if you keep looking at the trees, see?

I said yes

Thank you, Fred

River of Eden

 I was running up the river bed dry

She was naked laying in her bed

Her stones had not bled, and she could not cry

Her dress of water was locked in store

And she was cold lying on the stone floor

I ran up the Biddle combe brook

And it gave to me a sideways look

Who are you to trample on my bones?

Can't you see I lie alone

I need no other to claim my throne

Or cast about my care-worn stone

I am nature the mother grown

But no other shall me own

I looked about and saw 

The folly of the broken door

And just as if the river was smarter

I started to hear the sound of laughter

And in ripples and in childish tides

Her water dress trickled down over her thighs

And filled the dry bed where once she was wed

With its web-locked fingers, and its fluidity spread

And curled in crispness of a fresh salad bed

That springs up after the first rains 

And I like a leaping monkey had to jump out her way

Or her water dress would have swallowed me up

In her water cress-caress I was a fungi

Soft as a velvet Jews ear

And I could listen to her glistening and glamorous stories

Of the time she joined the Gulf stream

To travel for a day and a year

But she returned in the rain clouds

Heavy and all out of sorts

He had left her near the Isle of Iona of course

For a Madagascan or Chillian sport

So she returned to her hilly spring 

She dressed herself in black,

And she lay in ground waters low in the basin

Of the Mendip hills limestone cavernous crack

She stayed like a widow in mourning 

she lay in a suicide pact

With the staligtites and staligmites adorning

Her chamber of echoing fact

She called to her own deep reflection

And she spoke with the mirror of the cave

And it said you're the source so remember

It is only from you we can make waves

So go out into the world once again

When the cold air will not turn you to ice

And be the river of Eden

That runs out through paradise

Mulligatawny Owl

The Mulligatawny owl, went on its Mulligatawny prowl

Looking for the mice, with that curry spice

They had recently moved into the district

And brought their cooking and cultural instinct

And it was far from the Tawny owl's own taste

But then again he thought I do so like my mouse paste

He enjoyed spreading it on his bread at home

Up in the tree where he lived all alone

Apart from some squirrels

And a brace of rabbits

Who dug under the roots

As was their habit

And the squirrels always said how gross

That he eats these mice

Because they liked to boast

They only ate the finest acorn from the oak

And this they kept as their private joke

And the owl stayed at home

As he heard their chitter-chatter

He thought those pesky squirrels

What a clatter of skitter-scatter

They make as they scurry up and down the trunk

He wished he could sleep and that he were drunk

But he remembered the mice

And thought what paradise

For tonight when I awake, I'll go out and hunt

Meanwhile the mice were down in their holes

Cooking up something nice to share with the voles

And the word got around that some special creatures were in town

And the smell of their cooking it wafted on the coals

And oh what a hullabaloo it caused

When the mice came out with their mulligatawny soup in their paws

And fed the other rodents in kingly sized portions

Just as they would do on the Indian sub-continent

And everyone said: oh thank you so much

For this food you have prepared which we eat for our lunch

It is really more than a mouse should do

To prepare for ourselves such a delicious stew

So the Mulligatawny mice went home

All gleaming with pride and warmed to the bone

And it was getting late in the morning so they thought

Lets go to bed

So they did just that and went and rested their heads

But when the day began to turn into dusk

They awoke, inside them with a hungry lust

And looked in their cupboards and checked in their pots

But they were all out of their precious ingredients

What we need one said, named Meg, are some nuts

We could ground them like the almonds we brought with us

And add with them eggs from the chicken huts

Which we stole, said the vole, with a certain kind of distrust

I say what we need are some Lentils then said Jo, and Nel said

Lets try the Farmstead, I'm sure we could go

And inside the kitchen cupboards - I know a backdoor in - 

We will find jars of the stuff, though they're starting to thin

While others sourced the carrots and the onions from the field

They all went about preparing for their evening meal

And now for the spice, all the mice rejoined

You don't have to ask twice, that is one thing we purloined

Meanwhile the Mulligatawny owl, went out on his second Mulligatawny prowl

And he was quite peckish, infact a ravenous raptor was he

All tied up in his excitement, he quickly flew out of the tree

And he scanned all around the horizon and the field

Searching his line of sight, his eyes on his meal

There were foxes abroad, and hares boxing in furrows

And square looking toads, and rabbits peeping from burrows

And up in the sky the crows criss-crossed overhead, 

they were on their way to the parliament, like ministers of the dead

And the owl wandered on his path softly winding

His feather beat quiet, like raider in deciding

Cutting his way through the cool gloaming air

With his razor sharp claws, hanging like knives right there

I'm looking for a mouse, have you seen him? Who Who?

He lives in a house, like an underground zoo

And it's full of the vermin, the pests of the field

And I'm the pest controller come to pick up my meal

I'm looking for a mouse, have you seen him? You Hoo?

The type that is a louse, a degrader of twoo

And do you know him? Who who?

Do you know him? You Hoo?

If you see him, do let me know

Or next I'll be coming for you!

Quite unbeknownst to the terror from the air

The mulligatawny mice invaders were scouting their lair

And had found a few good portions of carrots and peas

And were carrying them back home, when who did they see?

But the little vole who came running up to them to plead

Please go home mice, before the Mulligatawny owl makes you bleed!

A Mulligatawny owl, how can that be?

Is he as fast as a fox or as quick as a crow

Is he as clever as a cat, or as slow as a cow

As dumb as a duck, up the top of a gum tree

Oh fee, fie fo fum

Who's afraid of this owl? How come?

Not me said Nel, not me cried Jo, well as you see said Meg

We aren't afraid so

Neither should you be, in the grand scheme of things

This owl is not a threat to us

He is but a nothing

Well the owl kept flying on his aerial comb of his surroundings

He was an ace pilot

Quick as a wink, if he spotted a mink, he swooped on lonely vole

But this doesn't make a meal he said as he swallowed him whole

No what I'm looking for I cannot seem to find

There is a scent of stewing, of the tempting kind

And If I should follow it back to its source

Surely then I'll make my meal full course

So with his eyes he scoured and with his nose he sniffed

And with all of these powers an owl knows what he's whiffed

A Mulligatawny mouse he cried, and his big eyes opened wide

A Mulligatawny mouse whoopy, A mulligatawny mouse I'll have for my tea

And the Owl swept down from the sky and landed near the house

Of the Mulligatawny mice pie, and he said to himself

What's that I can smell cooking

But a Mulligatawny sauce I know well without looking

And who's that I can hear with my great owl ear

But a Mulligatawny mouse tea party coming near

And just as he predicted the other mice of the field

Were trooping their way to their evening meal

Which they planned to share with their mouse pals

Well that was as near they got when they saw the owl

It swooped down upon them, a white flash from the air

And Nel was carried off, Meg cried where's Nel she's not there

She's not here either exclaimed Jo with a growl

Oh it was that pesky, white-winged, mulligatawny owl

Meanwhile Nel was being carried off into the night

When she came to, she saw white feathers and an imposing sight

The Mulligatawny owl's beak protruding in front

She wanted to cry, but then she thought up a stunt

From her mouse pouch, she brought a pawful of spice

And then she lifted it to her snout and blew on it twice

And the powder flew up into the owl's beak and nose

And he sneezed - "A mulligatissue!" and released his great toes

And as she did fall Nel felt with her paws

And brought out on top of her a pair of her draws

And so slowly she floated back down on to earth

With her knickers as a parachute she knew what brief life was worth

Slowly she looked around from her clump of nettles 

and could see nothing in the pitch black, but felt unsettled

What else could be lurking in this patch of ground?

Could it be a fox or a cat or even a hound?

And which way was home, oh what a curse!

But at least now alone, with the owl it was worse

And to come out-unscathed, wow it was true

She couldn't believe what she'd managed to do

Just then a shrew came up and sniffed

And said are you that Nel, who the mice all have missed?

Nel said why yes I am she, now show me the way home

For so grateful I'll be, now I'm not out here all alone

When they arrived, the Mulligatawny stew was cooked

The others in a search party had been out and looked

But they soon met the shrew and their beloved Nel

And they toasted her return and rang the homecoming bell

Well what a story Nel had to tell

As they ate Mulligatawny soup by the old bell

And the Owl who was angry and hungry what's worse

Had to go home to hear the Squirrels chat - his curse

And if there's a moral to this story then let it be

That Mulligatawny dinner with a mouse is not free

And every lunch must be paid for, every grain has a price

Whether eaten by Mulligatawny owl or by three blind mice

Octopodimore roundabout

 Octopodimore roundabout

Is just about what an Octopus shouts

When he thinks it is too busy on the roads

While he is eating Spaghetti

While talking to a toad

And this kind of activity can be a dangerous thing

Especially if the toad begins to sing

Because like Pavarotti he loves to sing of things

That get his gilgotti and make his microwave ping

So he replies it's like Spaghetti junction round here

And then a Baloney Sandwich suddenly appears

And says Bologna, Bologna, well what'd I hear?!

Stop talking Baloney, you know there's nobody near

And he don't count - hey keep your hands on the wheel!

Mr Octopody you're making me feel kind of queer

Well I can't blame you, said the toad

I'm always telling him to keep his eyes on the road

Eyes on the road? Which eye may I ask yer, asked the spider

Which ever one you can, answered the eight legged outsider

Hey man, why are ya trying to push in here?

Can't you see there's plenty of room for the four of us?!

No five, cried the Beer, well would you look at the head on that said the toad

Then the Octopus started sipping it, the sandwich said "Mind the road!"

Don't drink and drive cried the beer, I've too much to live for cried the spider in fear

So now you're afraid of a little alcohol, hey man I'm no light weight I just want to keep my head clear

Well its too late for that said the heavyweight boxer, I'm finishing my dinner plate

Then I'm driving to Uttoxeter, you can't be serious Said the Octopus

Yes I am now my gloves are off, I'm not pulling any punches

Hang a left here said the toad with a moan,

No take a right, said the beer in barotone

"Well I thought I was the only one with a voice so deep!"

"Be quiet everyone the Octopus is asleep"

At the wheel! cried Baloney, well it makes me feel lonely

Boy said the Beer I must stronger than I knew

The heavyweight said who do you think you're talking to!

Then he started a fight in the back, but before it got bad

The car had gone off track onto the hard shoulder

Where chips flew off the block

And they came to a stop

Would you like fish with that?

Asked the little chief,

And then the line, like the front tyre, went flat

What have we all become?

I see in your face the lines I can trace

Back to where we used to run

Through fields and streams in our childhood dreams

Oh what have we all become? 

What have we all become?

You knock on my door, but its not like before

Too many years have past under the sun

Oh what have we all become?

We keep ourselves, like books on the shelves

Some change, fade to dust and some survive,

But strange how time aids and still keeps alive

These things in us that remind of someone

What have we all become?

And it just doesn't seem real, all these things that I feel

They just seem like melodies that are yet to be sung

What have we all become?

All the faces I've seen, show all the things that have been

But darling we've hardly begun

Yet what have we all become?

There are roads that cross in the desert, and tracks that meet in between

And paths we have taken, though some are forsaken

And some are rivers yet to be swum

So what have we all become?

I cross my arms and I wonder, I ponder on those misty things

They come in frightening thunder, they strike like lightning stings

As in my mind all their images hung

What have we all become?

I hold out my palms to catch a falling drop, 

And water is like a balm, that makes the pain stop

But the thought still remains when it's gone

What have we all become?

Trying to move

 I tried to move you through the Meer

I tried to love you, that much is clear

But did I tug too hard at your ear

Or did I lug around my baggage of fear

Who is in control, is it me or is it it?

I see the magpie and the cuckoo spit

But who is calling the crow to quit

Is it why I forgo all kinds of shit

I paid my penalty, I paid my price

So why still the enemy lives in paradise

I bought my ticket, I didn't ask twice

Yet still you'd give me plenty of your ice

What is there that I forgot to tie

Was it your cross I bear or mine

Do you sing where the leaves dry

Or stop and bear the tears I cry

I have been where you are sitting

There were many reasons for my quitting

But they all stem out of a fear of committing

And it is clear it's the atom I'm splitting

It will explode in my hands as a bomb

It will unfold like the sands I comb

It will turn up in the sea shoal tombes

That are read by all the fish headed blondes

And I am leaning into their wake

From the ship of all my mistakes

But I am yet to climb aboard

Oh what is life about my lord? 

Four Years

 Well you know four years in a lifetime

Is not so long

When you’re a child your heart and legs are strong

And then you grow older

And you do school too

You know four years in a lifetime

Is just something you do

 

Four years in a love life

Is like writing a book

Its full of highs and lows

And you become easily hooked

And some days it gets so bad

You just can’t let go

Four years in a love life

Is still just something you do

 

Four years for a swallow as everyone knows

Is from the summer haze to the winter throes

And they sleep on the wing, and they follow rainbows

Four years for a swallow, time flies just so

 

Well four years for a beggar, will beggar belief

For the places he sleeps on edge of the streets

And on top of park benches, or under shop windows

Fours years for a beggar is like trying on clothes

 

Four years for a thief doing hard time

Is like stealing his soul, behind steel bars that bind

But if you steal a heart then you ought to know

Four years apart, is four years left behind

 

Four years for a king, when shadows climb his walls

Fours years of silence, when dark times befall

And his castle becomes dreary, and his heart suffers no fools

Four years for a king is like a trouble that calls

 

Four years for me, is not four years for you

Four years for a crow, is not four but two

For she flies ever straight just like an arrow

While time like a river meanders below

 

And if I were you, then my four would be two

And if you were I then my two would soon go

Down into nothing, when the sweet wind blows

Four years is a nothing for the flowers of the meadow

A Telling Time

 I've been out the back of the wrongside of tomorrow

And I've gotten back what I beg, steal or borrow

And although I might lack the eyes to see through sorrow

When my tears dry, where they lead I must follow

And nature cried in the heartland of the sun

The creator tried to bury what he had begun

But bring forth Mary, bring back Jesus the son

And all of those quarries of moon rock by the ton

They fill up my stocking, they go knocking at my door

They slide down the bannister, of the memories of before

And pull open the cannister, the rocket ship that endures

Through space I'm now the traveller to a love I adore

I see her in the gardens, in the pearly realms

Where queens walk in the park under the boughs of Elms

And who knew their shoulder sparks would hold tight the helm

As the nation's ship goes sailing, though darkness overwhelms

She is my Captain, I am her slave

And as we go sailing through disaster, I try to master each wave

But if someone throws me a lifeline, I know it's myself I must save

And in the process rescue all my hopes and dreams from the grave

Three blind mice

 It was blindingly obvious,

But I didn't have a blind thing to do

I didn't have the first idea, not muddied nor clear

I didn't have a pot to piss in

Or a cross to bear

But I had you in my horizons

And I will plot a course there

It was like the blind leading the blind

Down a blind alley trying to find

Their blind spot, caught on the trot

With a pig's hoof and blind to the truth

The proof was in the pudding

Of the third eye and when I swallowed it down

I saw I was a spy, who had been taken over

By a consortium of lies

About the epoch and blind-sightedness

That covers up our eyes

And no I can't look the truth in the face

Who ever could stare direct at our race

And say yes I love this or no I hate that

Whether we are compared to a pig, or compared to a cat

We are animals in the frame just the same

Except Darwin could never remember his name

And Hamlet made such otherwordly claims

That for his weakness to be blindness, was enough to shoulder his blame

And Oedipus rex he couldn't complain

Of the virtue of truth telling

The blind and the lame

The good and the bad and down right mad

Who married his mother and murdered his dad

A Brief Encounter

 I saw this pair of Y-fronts talking to a pair of frilly knickers in a railway station café

I thought it was strange, then the mist cleared and I could see

The set had rearranged

Now the Frilly knickers was giving the Y-fronts a wave

Must you go Frilly knickers?

I'm afraid I really must...you see your Y-fronts and my Frilly knickers

They really can't touch, there is...just...too much at stake.

You are married then? To another pair of Y-fronts?

Yes darling, but of course and so must you be too..to another pair of Frilly knickers?

I'm afraid that is the truth, sad but true, she is shopping as we speak I expect

in Miss Selfridges for a pair of bloomers

Bloomers, Gosh!

Yes, don't I know it.

And do you have children also?

I do...oh but my dearest Frilly knickers what we have is so special

Surely we mustn't let our chance slip away?

You must let me go Y fronts. What we have had was wonderful, but I must get on this train

Last train to Goring Streetly, about to depart.

My darling I shall never forget you

You will always be close to my heart Y-fronts

And I shall also keep the memory of your face, Frilly Knickers, close to my Y-fronts

As she boarded the train

I thought what are the chances?

I must have walked in on a remake of 

That scene from A Brief Encounter 

Worn out pieces of trash

 If you are sure you found them

If the motor turns or claims

Then the service that will start them

May turn a key inside your brain

If you stand with both arms folded you know

You're sure to stand in vain

But if you stand with both palms open

Then here's a hoping they'll be your refrain

Don't stick it to the Major

You know he doesn't care

Don't stick it to Jimmy carter

When you know that he won't barter

No you know his name

His name is on the lion's mane

His name is in the working bane

In the living pain

And dying drain

That flushes out apostles from imposters

And the dossiers from the monsters

And it brings all the monasteries to the brink of disasterous

Corpuscles who wait in corpus Christi forums

Or museums of rust

And anti-trust fund babies

Who run around with rabies

And curtain off the Habeus Corpus of the law

Until we all say you cannot touch the spirit anymore

And they die in the gutter of what they utter

As the trains roll on in utter contempt for the law

And the politicians splutter their gonorrhoea swollen spores

Over the poor and cough and cutter up

The fish heads above their doors

Who stand guard for the hard sailors

Who've gone left their wives in the arms

Of those they implore to do more

Than they would in their plaices

But not so yellow as their soles, they sold

For a quarter of a penny more

And this is the quarter of an hour mark to heaven.

This is dialectically opposed to forgiven, 

Gibbons of gibbous moons

And loons and ducks and geese of all Canada held spent

In the arms race with the moose

But she went on the ice and drowned in a barrel twice as tall as

The tallest apple bobber and then she felt

Like she might explode, she smelt it and then she did it

COVID Coracle 8 or 9? 20th November

 Today I had early lessons from 7.30 am again, and my bum felt so sore, that I had to lie down for my last lesson. I honestly don't know why more lessons aren't given in bed or from a bed, it really is much more comfortable in my opinion.

The main thing I find that is hard is getting to sleep with this pain in my ass, I think somehow I deserved it, perhaps it was for coming hre in the first place.

So Today I slept in after my last lesson which finished at 10.30 am -I slept until about 1500 and then start to think how to solve the pain. So I phoned up the Hungarian Doc -dr Maynart - who quite rightly proceeded to check my credentials as a Hungarian resident - in general he seemed fed up to hear from me - who I assume he thought was another stupid bloody tourist asking for help, and really he can't give it until he knows you have a Hungarian health card - though he seemed to take a somewhat obnoxious attitude as to condescend to me, slightly as if I were  a child - like he simply couldn't understand my name Scully - it was virtually impossible to spell it out for him, and his rather brusque and bruising attitude made me even less sure of my telephone number - so each of these things I had to repeat several times in English and then I tried saying them in Hungarian but found I have forgotten most of my Hungarian knowledge through lack of use.

It is not really so useful, but anyway he got to the end of his questions and then I noticed my TAj - Hungarian health card expired in April this yearso effectively I am not insured, except I pay tax and should be - but there was a pandemic and I left the country. 

The second thing I did was to book my train ticket from Luton to Bristol on Sunday, that was worrying me - it leaves me a very small window inwhich to find somewhere else, and if I need to I suppose I could change the ticket back again.

The thing is accommodation here probably won't be ready until January and then if it is I need to survive here until then.

So the other problem if I choose to stay here is how do I pay for extra stay, when Natwest have kindly cancelled my card as they suspect fraud and re-issued it to a UK address? This poses a problem as my Hungarian money is nearly all gone. I could ask for it to be forwarded to me and stay here or I could just return back there.

If I go back there I will need to continue with care work - unless I get the car park job - in which case I'll have moved slightly forward in nature conservation ladder from volunteer to car park attendant in what ten years? - ok the last 4 years I haven't been trying but still that is a hard slog. Still it is worth it if you want to work outdoors.

Then again here - there seems to be a potential job through some company in Batorbágy near Etyek Budapest. And then I could stay put here. I would need to pay another 300 pounds roughly, but from my UK account and that could get me to January when I could move into Ágnes's house, and then I would still need a job to cover it.

I miss the rain

 I've walked along the lonely roads

I've walked there time and time again

But I don't know what those old odes

Have to say of pain

All I know is: I miss the rain

I've stepped upon the merry-go-round

Gone round time and time again

But I don't know who's wearing the crown

If it's the king or someone insane

All I know is: I miss the rain

This old Earth is dry of course

And it's rivers dry and dry again

And I don't know if I am worse

But the good I try to retain

All I know is: I miss the rain

And is it that you can here it coming?

That lonesome whistle train?

Is it that you see me thumbing

A lift with you again

All I know is: I miss the rain

A signal left in the box

A feather on a weather vein

An individual case of chicken pox

A letter sent in vain

All I know is: I miss the rain

Each single drop is some full stop

Each trail is a wagon train

And it rolls on until it pops

Up upon a desert plane

All I know is, I miss the rain

A change it must be coming

As the moon begins to wane

For I hear the sound of drumming

And the soldiers march in Spain

All I really know is: I miss the rain

Covid Coracles 7

 So last night - being the 17th November I heard back from the car park job with the RSPB and the fact of an interview on the 23rd. For me I was really happy about this. It is a move away from teaching - but I could still continue online teaching I think or just cut it out altogether which would be a shame, but perhaps I am finding it rather difficult to use computers so much. So anyway I had a morning lesson early from 7.30 - it was hard to want to do this so early but it is work I suppose. The thing is it is only two lessons per week.

So then I was more free - I tried to feel motivated to study - well to make these English articles which someone else very clever has written and then I pick out the interesting words and make gap fill exercises based on their definitions. It is fine and it was by adam Rutherford - he loves saying how Humans are animals - and very closely related but then at the same time we are not - this is my overall impression - basically we share many genes or DNA sequences with a cuttle fish or a shark or a chicken, but at the same time he refutes the apparently alt right psychologist ....who says we are all like lobsters - and we have an in built hierarchy. So basically this is all the same kind of thing connected with gender bias and equality of work roles for men and women - there is the point blank concept or belief that we are all equal - this is the fact that we should all be treated equally - and then there are those who don't think that who sue evidence as they see it to prove this from Science - like the lobsters- then Rutherford comes along and says yes but lobsters also urinate through their faces which is obviously also disgusting and any way you get the idea. I actually think even if we find all this proof both sides of the argument - it will still divide people because proof and the truth are things that are in doubt internationally - we each have a right to believe in something or at least you have a right in a free world or country, the fact is in these free worlds the liberal agendas flourish and in the countries where there is no right to believe anything you like then people are scared to say what they think and that is like it is in Hungary.

        I see this because if I look at responses in face book - there is not a great free discussion - people are afraid to say what they actually like because of being criticized. I also felt somewhat criticized today -18th when I said that the police made me feel a bit nervous because they carried guns. People acting in a certain way makes me feel nervous - not the guns. But if you add guns into the equation then you add the risk. If you encounter somebody who has a screw lose and they are unarmed then you are not as worried as if you encounter them when they have a screw lose and they weild a knife or carry a gun.

So getting back to the 17th - I did some more on the climate change application too and then Mate the y guy from next door and shares the same birthday as me except 6 years earlier he was bringing in wine and offered me some. I had had a fairly sedate birthday and so I thought why not and found my self famished so I over drank, mixed it with left over birthday beer we discussed the house, smoked a bit and then I left him to write his book. After this I watched a film about police actually very good - called End of watch about a tough US neighbourhood with a high mexican population and people traffiking and two cops who were best buddies and discovered some bad things that it would have been easier for them to look away from, but obviously they didn't because that is why they are heroes and they do the right thing.

Anyway actually I watched that the day before I think - it doesn't matter -so I definitely also watched Avengers infinity wars on the previous night and then last I watched avengers End game. Then I cooked some potatoes, beetroot and carrots or undercooked them ate them and at 330 am woke and had diarheoa for an hour. The result was I felt ok for a bit did some work wrote a poem, went back to sleep for an hour got up at 7 ish cooked some leftovers but more fully and ate that for dinner. After this I had a lesson with someone  yes. Around the middle of the day I realized I needed a shower and while doing so discover pain in the ass I felt was indeed a thrombose haemorrhoid. It is still with me now as I write and so I may need to lie down to write.

Covid Coracles Blog 6?

 Saturday I filled in RSPB Ham Wall car park job

Sunday I applied for Climate change officer in Glastonbury

Monday was my birthday spent in Quarantine. Rather a difficult situation, but mostly nice, my room is small, but I had some lessons in the morning. The Chinese student was sick when I called her so that was cancelled. A bit of a relief actually as I find it quite difficult to speak with her at the moment. It may be my patience - she is very nice, but I get the sense I speak too fast, and I find it hard to teach below intermediate level students. The lesson before that was interesting and with a Hungarian student who is an expert in water melons, and we previously discussed Mary Reynolds who was the youngest person to win the Chelsea flower show and had a film made -Dare to be Wild - no actually that was last Mondays lesson so actually it was on the meat free diet and the impact this can have on climate change.

So this vegetarianism idea she also previously prompted me to watch The Game Changers which tries to repain the male stereo-type Macho man because he eats meat into it being acceptable for him to be a vegetarian. That is a good thing and I watched this on my birthday- and for that day I felt a renewed resolve to become a vegetarian - I found it such a convincing film, but alas these feelings don't last. It is probably lacking the echo chamber of friends or simply other humans being on your own so long - that a video can influence your mind to the extent you do not want to listen to your own body - and in fact that was exactly what Brigi said who works here, when I went downstairs to meet the police I think. That it is a dangerous thing to watch these kind of well marketed films. The other one I watched was the social dilemma and that was similarly disturbing and not so inspiring. I mean it made me want to quit facebook. Because of how everything is tracked and it is polarizing society because it is only providing you with your friends who think like you. One advantage of Hungary is that people here are very different from me - and many facebook friends here are from very different backgrounds and I feel I have a much broader range of options here -although my British sensibilities come up against harsh realities.

There are clearly times when it is important to stare and stand your ground - such as if an angry dog is attacking you - or maybe a bear...I think at least - and then the occasion in 2018 here when a Budapest man who seemed crazy and I was staring I think just at the size of him and the fact of his appearance and evidently clocked me - I was on a bike and then he some how engineered it for his dog to collide with my back bicycle wheel as I was turning the corner across the erzebet street and Jokai something or other and he was on the crossing any see Ballad of a Budapest cyclist for this https://scullychristopher.blogspot.com/2018/11/ballad-of-budapest-bicyclist.html

Anyway I can't remember where I was  oh yes - so the fact is this quarantine has been pretty ok generally - the police come everyday -sometimes in the evening mostly in the morning in the past few days - and they are nice and friendly. The thing is today - and it did not effect me too much - but there is one police guy who came before with two recruits or at least more junior officers and they said please show us ID - which no one else had done -since they call my number and ask to see me -but this guy wanted to see my ID -I didn't have it on me as I don't normally show it. So a slight delay I have to go all the way back up the stairs to get it and come down - they are all down their smoking by this time and I show it to them and I feel there is this intimidating presence to this policeman - then today 18th November two of them are back but with a military soldier who is carrying a gun - I do not really notice this since I just go straight out and hand over my passport - but the receptionist looks actually visibly pale and a bit frightened - I think just the presence of a soldier there when it was completely unnecessary for the job.

    I think this is why I mentioned it on facebook - I felt a little nervous of these people -this specific guy who was very serious - I wonder whether he is pissed off at having to do this job. In the UK police are not going around enforcing quarantine so strictly - they are eating donuts and drinking coffee. Then again there are a lot more of them probably and there is nothing to do. I don't think policing means throwing your weight around unnecessarily because that is plain bullying and intimidation. Perhaps Hungarian police are stretched, but really what is going on for them to police, hardly anyone is out on the streets - there is a so called night time curfew in which everything is shut -and yet they are acting like they in some kind of police state and all the rules of decency break down - I think that is slightly what I find frightening here -there is not a web of decency among people that I can understand that means when normallife of commerce or picking your kids up at school goes - there is not much of a community left. I am sure my saying Hungarians are not decent will put peoples' backs up but I am not saying that I am saying that there is a common level of human dignity that I know in the UK or have grown up to believe exists between people and I just haven't had that experience here - I mean maybe I would feel it if I had grown up here. The fact is being an alien here somewhat is trying to navigate so many pitfalls of social graces and customs - if I say police authoritarianism then people will spout the rule that police must carry guns and they are accompanied by soldiers as part of supporting their work. The question of can citizens be trusted to stay in quarantine is a whole other thing. 

For me it is especially weird because I have no sickness, but perhaps it would be weirder if I were sick being visited by armed police.

First time/Last time

 I tried it first time, since an hour ago, first time

Since an hour ago

First time since I let you go

Oh first time since I walked on the moon

First time since I came back too soon

I loved you first time, oh but did you love me too?

I loved you first time I saw you in the bar

First time with your arms around that jar

First time, but was it the first time you got into my car

First time since the time before

First time and since then I loved you even more

First time

First time drilling for your heart in the room

First time I asked if I could borrow your broom

First time I watched her move in your womb

First time I saw a baby born on zoom

First time a zombie president won a district of doom

First time for me, but was it your first time too?

First time I got an electric shock

First time the floor boards knock

First time since I looked at the clock

It was my first time I turned my key in your lock

But was it your first time oh my lover my friend

Now I'm so sad this is the first time it must end

Last time I bit my lip on the spoon

Last time I walked in while you were starting to swoon

In no time did I hear the cock croon

It was the last time for him, was it your last time too?

Last time I knew just what to do 

Last time I noticed you doing it too

Last time we were both breathing on cue

But it was nil point to the monkey

And nil point to the zoo

Last time I stuck my hand in my wallet

When I pulled it out it was like it had come from swallet

And I don't know if you knew about it too?

Was it the first time for me, the last time for you?

Fresh Air

 Out of whack, hay stack

I'm in a field without a meal

In the can without a plan

On the straight and narrow arrow

I'm in a jam with a little lamb

Down the pan and far from real

Making an appeal

To an orange peel

Too much to grind its rind

I'm asking it to slip and slide

Off the edge of the tide

And be my bride, be on my side

In the war to end all wars

I've got my Goat, but whose got his?

Is it yours or is it the Kid's?

I've asked you twice now I can't write

The potato blight has blotted my ink

And I can't think inside the sink

No I can't stink on the brink

Its in my brain I've got the grain

Its all this toil in the soil

Washed down my drain with the rain

In the forests of the night

Its off the leaf and suffered relief

It's dripping, tripping donkey brief

As Ehor, or Elron, deltron, electron

Mastercard poor

American express, is useless, unless

You can self-express first

I don't mean breast milk

But the best silk or satin sleeves

When the shore rises and you can't believe

Your luck to be where you were born

Inside the truck driving through the storm

And suddenly bright lights are torn

From the dawn's hue, as cascading

Valleys of thorn criss-cross in virtue

Of being new

Or solidarity of what we've all been through

Before, before the storm

There was no time

And 

We wait it out

And give up doubt

Because somewhere, somehow

We must come out

Into fresh air

Lucio, Lucio

 Lucio, lucio

Like a tornedo, coming on

Sweeping through the town

Lucio, Lucio

Everyone makes roomeo

Can I be your romeo

I don't know if I'm so strong

Lucio, Lucio

The times That I see you so

Far from the brink I know you're gone

Well Lucio, Lucio

Life's no joke you know

You gotta take the bull by the horns

Before it's all gone

Lucio, Lucio

This feeling does ever grow

Like the ferns and evergreens of the garden

And who can hold hands with the poor understands

How fleeting life can be deep in his bones

A love story

 Well I once loved a woman her name it was Bess

I asked her to marry me, of course she said yes

And we had many children, and we had lots of fun

And we rested by the river when our day was done

And the windmills kept turning, and sea was a froth

And the haystacks were burning upon the hill tops

And I saw in her eyes that she loved the soldier

And I saw in her stare she wished I were older

The little ones grew up and they visited the fare

And they asked all around for the crown of the Mayor

And he came and gave out bread and fine ale

And we drank it all down until the barrels went pale

Well I knew my first love was above all the rest

I knew when I married her, I had married the best

For she never looked down and was always well dressed

And I walked proud through the town for I'd married my Bess

And she saw that I loved her, she saw it so true

But did I kid glove her, the only woman I knew?

I kept her and gave her my hand that was strong

To hold onto the plough for the whole lived-day long

I gave her a house and a coat so warm

I protected the house, battened down to the storm

But one day something changed and she turned the screw

And it blew off the roof of the only home we knew 

A finer man with a house grand and a soldier sworn

Returned to claim the title to which he was first born

And he threw out the farmers and brought in new ones

He said the old timers are over, on this land they are done

And so into the streets us tennant farmers went

To beg for our scraps of work, on the land we were spent

And our families they shivered in the houses of the poor

When the rich folk all abandoned us, to us they closed their door

But we kept on looking into that gleaming, golden sun

That rose in the the morning the same for everyone

And we knew that our time was not at an end

And that soon around the corner there must come a friend

So we waited and we worked, we whistled and we chewed

And the little ones grew stronger for their parents gave them food

And we drank our cup of ale at the county fair, 

And we yelled when crops did fail, for in truth we fought despair

And then the winter struck and we were caught in storm

The taverns were stocked with ale, but their beds could not keep us warm

And so we moved camp and trudged a while through snow fall

But God in his infinite mercy sought to keep us from biting maul

On and on relentless, the night winds did wail

Calling for our souls, but in our hearts we did not fail

Even though little Tommy fell back, and his eyes began to close

We pulled him closer to us, put him back upon the road

For only in our trust in God could our love also be strong

Together through the wilderness, our hearts they were in song

Though cold did bite, and bitterness might cause our lips to freeze

We knew full right, His merciful right was in the end to be our ease

And through trial and tribulation, there comes the victory fare

That we conquered all adversity and came out with love to spare

But never rest in complacent arrogance, that you have got somewhere

For always up the mountain we must push the thinning air

Finally my family, it came to breach the gap

Between restless uncertainty and the icy trap

We found a lodge abandoned in the dead of night

And such was our condition we entered without the right

Some matches and some fuel were left and a few husks of corn

But after fire and melted ice water we felt ourselves reborn

The corn it made for a soup, with the remainder of our provisions

And we slept well that night, though wolf pack sightst appeared in our visions

In the morning we could see our humble barn was made of strong lumber

And although the wind did blow we felt revived after our long slumber

The outside was of a scene of delicate majesty

In the background were high mountains, before us a river ran free

And salmon leapt inside the stream, as our hearts slept inside our dream

And certain then were we that this place would make our family home

I set to work teaching Tommy how to fish, we sharpened long poles

And hunted the shoals of fish trapped in artificial rock pools

And Maisy and Bess they went out to look and forage for mushrooms

They brought them back and made a soup, and soon had made up our bedrooms

The lodge looked beautiful there, it really resembled a home

And we were happy without a care, and we were quite alone

Only when night came did we fear the wolves and made our fires strong

And Tommy and I soon constructed a high fence, like the walls of Babylon

I found wild wheat and so made the feat of planting it within our compound

And within a few weeks, as the spring ice leaked, their seeds took root in the ground

And happy were we when finally we did see the first green shoots begin to grow

And that was fifteen summers back and now our wheat fields are all a golden glow

Because we had followed God's ruling hand, and followed our own hearts too

Love led the way out of shadowy lands to the promised pastures where life grew

And I look back now in memory with the wisdom of passing years

At what joy we have had and given more thanks to the good times than their due

While we remembered not to dwell too long on the bad times of tears

For they can impact and detract from the true path by which to steer

So keep up your spirits young man for the fires of heaven are raging

And they are calling you to follow the plan of God's war which he is waging

Against all evil, against all sin, against anything but the virtue to win

And fight for the right to meet the king, and live once again in his kingdom

Timeways

 If she could have waited, if she could have stopped

And seen what she was walking into

But that plate glass window

Of the future

Hit her square in the nose

She could see through it

But she could not touch the otherside

It was a bar to her outside world

And memory works like that

Memory of the event

Of the frame, the piece of time we call now

We say instant

But what is our concept of time  - but based on memory

And what is memory but an image, a sound or a smell

A taste, but what does it evoke

But a time,

So is time the conscious experience of the thing

Or the thing itself in space

And is time the bundle of emotions

Felt at her embrace

Or the unachievable other, the perfection in its place

Our idealized psychological conception

Of all the unrequited desires that we trace

Or our own projection of ourselves

Onto that other person's face

So what is time?

Why can the reality of now not be returned

Through some alchemy of science and art

To that sacred past

That hallowed space in youth

But it never can because in truth

Everything we have we lose

And yet light can travel at such a pace

That time seems not to pass through grace

And in this quantum intuition

Is where God and love can trace

And cross paths to weave a whirl wind

That connects beings across this great divide

So that feelings cannot hide

And all the martyrs who have died

Are reborn

And all the loves that ever danced at dawn

Are sworn again, not in vain

Nor in anguish or the pain of fear of loss

But to bear the cross

Of knowledge of this truth

As lightly as they bear the touch of rain

Upon their shoulders, on their roof

And in the soldier's heart

In the solders of the circuits of his brain

The electrons rearrange

And he sees her as if he always knew her

And always would in this way 

Once upon a time machine

 Once upon a time machine, I went walking 

In the bar

The bar broke bent

And shape-shifted

And time was called done

And after hours I slipped forth into the dead of night

The streets they were a dirty, empty of all the time of light

I asked the bobby on the beat could he spare the time

He looked at me from his high watch

Said I can spare you none

I asked the guard did he try hard to kill the time he had

But he was bereft for the time left

Had for him turned out bad

Next I walked along the road and met a friendly horse

He neighed and said of course I can because time is what I'm owed

I'm too long in the tooth and I'm in the knackers yard

If you are wise oh son me lad, you'll mind your time and guard

I moved on down with a whistle

Until I heard its answer spoke in vain

For I had come to the station

And at the platform stood a train

What time have you? I said aloud, the driver said quarter to eight

But I was speaking to the train said I, the driver said then you'll have to wait

This train has never been on time, this train was always late

Whether you asked it a question, whether you showed to it love or hate

The train will always arrive, just when it chooses to

And no man's watch can determine when it stops, not me, nor him or you

So with this explanation I looked up into the sky

And saw there bright circling birds above

And diamonds sparkling high

How long, how long must I wait

Before time shows me her hand

I'll hold it now said time to me

And with that time dropped her sand

And the hours seemed to pass in the glass

As I did tumble and fall

And night and day exchanged themselves

Like books upon their shelves

First I read the beginning lines

And then I read the end,

And all that I could see was time out of mind

And I knew time was my friend

So eventually the time did stop

The sand it ceased to fall

And I was stuck like a cuckoo clock

Poised, frozen upon a wall

I knew if I should step out now

My shadow would not follow

But what had I to lose,

But the lost time blues

So I did grit my teeth and swallow

The time is now said a voice

This what you must master

And know that in each time you have a choice

You may choose order or disaster

But none who know the outcome

Would have it any other way

For unless you are Cassandra

Then the future must seem a haze

Life as art

 My prediction is we will all stop wanting

To be artists, because unless you are a millionaire

There

Really is no point in even pretending

You stand a chance

Against the closeness of killing time

That comes after you like baying dogs

And the train tracks of certain logic

Lead you on

And on in inevitable perfection

If you could only stay on the tracks

But there is some self destruction that leads you off

Whether the road is cracked

Or that you have hit the road

With your hammar of art

To break up perfection

Into shattered pieces of life

You try to put back together

In your own collage of life

Then walk over these "Tombstones of damage"

That lead you onto the next precipice

And they say life is art

And Art is Life

And "the moving hand writes"

But we know not what it writes

And who holds the brush

And who paints the light

Or tells the birds to sing

Or ever wondered about anything

Bloglog 2

 14th November

Today I woke up feeling more refreshed and listened to radio 4. There was a nature documentary on Roseate Tern on Coquet island - someone who was the warden there speaking about being humbled by the force and power of the sea. It made me look up the island and the RSPB and then I saw an advert for a job on Shapwick Heath near where I come from and have lived most of my life. So I applied this morning. It was as a car park attendant, but you know actually I think that it would really suit me, I love being outside, I like meeting people and I think that nature reserve is fantastic. It did used to worry me being a local there and seeing how many cars parked up there and along the road side, but since the car park that has significantly solved the problem. There will likely be increased traffic flow along that road over Christmas, if there is not another lock down, but I also expect that people will still want to get out.

I think overall it has to be good that people visit these reserves, because we need to protect the environment, but also stop peat digging due to the carbon loss. Ironically if there had been no excavation there would be no wetland reserve probably. Also ironically there must be quite a lot of carbon emitted by all the people driving there cars to go and visit the reserves. Perhaps it would be more fuel efficient to organize a bus or coach there, but that is probably too much investment and planning. There also used to be a train track running down there, so could there not be again a network of more fuel efficient or electric trains that run on solar power or the like that ferries people along the track and saves all the cars?

Anyway, perhaps all this is pie in the sky, or pipe dream thinking since I am currently in an attic room in Budapest.

Little Hawk

 Little hawk, little hawk, little hawk

Flying between the trees

Hovering while I walk

But which one of us is more free

Am I your shadow

Or are you mine?

Little hawk, little hawk, little hawk

Through the rain and shine

Cows in stampede

Farmers call their yell

Cattle clang and ring bells

Down the slope of green

They come pell-mell

But you little hawk, just swoop up

Into the trees and watch

So content with your skill and your speed

You can stay balanced on the edge of the cup

While it spills the whole river out

And your eyes will scan for a trace of what's strange, 

You are a hunter little hawk, out on the range

The slightest movement in a field of grass

Waiting for the shrew or the dormouse to pass

And then down like a dagger, like a streak of pain

Down with your claws to strike your game

And that is the life of the hunting hawk

All ways at work, not a wing beat in vain

Making your way across the field where I walk

Little hawk, little hawk, little hawk in the rain

Roof tops

 You know that I can't shoot you down

I can't pull you down today

Yet all my life you have been hanging around

Like cloud on a rainy day

So what is it that you want from me?

To confront me?

Or make me pay?

Because I was not who you wanted me to be

Well I can't be that person anyway

So can't you leave your sky to me

You know it is my sky too

Why do you want to try to frighten me

Into trying to be somebody new

Now I look out from the roof tops

Across a city scape

And All I see are the places people stop

When from their lives they try to escape

You can reach your roots

In the garden

But only upward can you be closer to God

So hold on tight 

To the concrete thoughts that harden

And go out, follow where the angels trod