A nurse's advice

 You know a nurse's advice can ruin a life

They can tell you just how to behave

How to live and how to die

Like the livid blue sky

And in the end they'll lay you in your grave

They will tell you to wear shoes then say

Shuck them off

They will tell you sleep on a hard floor

Next they tell you soft

They will say get into a routine

And next why not shake it up?

Yes a nurse's advice, is like walking on ice

Don't do it unless you're a duck

Well I tried to go to the zoo the other day

Just to see the penguins play play play

But she told me put on sun screen

Or you'll burn your nose

Next minute she was telling me to take

Off all me clothes

Well to nurse's advice you must listen twice

Read between the lines of what they say

For if you want a good life

Then take my advice, when you see a nurse coming

Run the other way!

The face that launched a thousand buses

 She had the face that launched a thousand buses

Mrs T and her entourage of Big Brew Nurses

Rehearsing the flag pole march of the trusses

She came from Mars with her drink of Champions

And all you need is two dozen teas a day

The Doyens of the tea drinking fraternity say

But oh brother these sisters will have their way

So drink up your cup on the national day

They'll drop a penny down the wishing well

And care for you like you care to tell

So champion the weak, make them strong as hell

And drink your cuppa up as you say farewell

I came to see the giants of industry

And their towering ships of commerce stand

Around Bristol docks like Captains of business

But then you let go of my hand

I fell behind in the swell of the crowd

I was swept up in the riots that flowed down the street

And they toppled old giants that fell at their hands

And rolled like Ozymandias down at their feet

Then one pulled me up to my full stature

She gave me a tea to revive me and capture

The spirit of old times as the nation's bells chimed

From the cathedral on old college green

She said here's a picture of all you have seen

Here's an old record cover of the yellow submarine

And here is another mother in the city streets so mean

But then I saw buses, then I saw buses race round my head

I heard beauty birds twitter, I heard voices that said

This is the face that launched a thousand buses

This is the hand that picked me up when I was down

And this is the drink that will help you recover

So donate your money now to the charitable gown

Come spend your pennies in old Bristol town