Long Sutton Cricket club open Mic night -Silly point poetry

 Long Sutton, Long Sutton

You've treated us so kind

Though we may be legs of mutton

Our roads to you still wind

We all wish we were still lambs

You see for they are fair and kind

And yet the beat of iams

Still gives us our peace of mind

Your cricket team, they are a dream

But to me only a figment of my mind

For I always arrive at close of day

And the players having left I find

I wish one day to explore your moors

Oh amore a moor amore

Like those Romans of ancient times

Their feet walked on mosaic dimes

Each step a shining ducat or talent find

Like us pining to say fuck it valentine

They explored the world of gluttony

Using a feather to induce a vomit

Loved pleasure like Cleopatra and Anthony

Loved comedy as Wallace and Gromit

So not too different except for tragedy

They had a few mad despots

But let's not split hairs, ours not theirs

We've still got these open mic spots

So thank you Long Sutton Cricket club

For your haranguing and arranging

Now we've paid the ticket price for the night

The venue, hall rental and even more far ranging

Paid for the privilege of reading our rhymes 

in a space defined by performers

Just mind you keep well away from the crimes

Of pushing the boundaries of ex-reformers

For then like the Roman invaders who imposed

Their will upon the Britons

We hope our rhymes are better composed

And fill up the chairs we sit on

Freedom notes

 I met her at a party

I didn't know she was your wife

I only kissed her partly

It was once and never twice

She was leaving as it was ending

But the dancing carried through the night

I thought I was expending 

So much energy on living this life

All the parrots they are flocking

Across the rainforest canopy

I can see it now my head unlocking

That I just wanted to be free

I saw her much later on

And she recognized me

But I had already sung my song

Like a bird trying to be free

She was sitting up at the bar

She looked lonely to me

What was it that had gone wrong so far

She said the night was setting her free

I regret I should have spoken some more

I should have helped unlock her with my key

But I was already heading for the door

And my momentum was carrying me

There's a place and there's a silence

You must find within yourself

If it comes it ends the violence

And it's a key to your mental health

I can't be the one to save you

You must rescue you

But the world is full of charlatans and fools

Who will try and lead you away from truth

So what was she doing there

Hanging out in a crowd like that

They were all lost in their own way

Playing at life's blackjack

I want to tell her not to gamble

When she's feeling so vulnerable

The road is long and you must ramble

Along it, but it's understandable

I caught a feather in the air

The bird had already flown

I wish I knew if she was still sitting there

While I had already walked home 

Frog chorus of the river bank

 Coming out of the blue

I saw you in red

Coming out of the fog

I raised my head

And leaping onto logs

I said

I'm out I'm alive

Don't make me go 

Back down that pithole

I don't want to work underground

It'll destroy my soul

But likewise

I don't have the energy

To rise above this dull chorus of frogs

Who ribbet and bekekex bekekex

koax koax

croak their throats

At river boats

passing over

Coming out of the blue 2

 Couldn't hide my hand as I was talking to you

I said I'm coming out of the blue

I had no idea on earth what I was going to do

I was just coming out of the blue

And I needed you, do you need me too?

Well I'm coming out of the blue

And I hope you find your peace of mind

As I'm coming out of the blue

I held my hand up to the sky

As it was coming out of the blue

I can't find the words or even try

As I was coming out of the blue

Another world

 In another world we could have been fine

In another world you could have been mine

In another world and time

In another world we crossed over the line

In another world of music and wine

In another world and time

Oh why can't that world be like this

All I ever wanted was your kiss

All I ever seem to do here is climb

Into another world and time

I'm in  luck there's heart I can find

another world and time

I got stuck up in a grape vine

about another world and time

Coming out of the blue 1

 Coming out of the blue

I can feel it too

I'm coming out of the blue

I know where to go

Know where I'm heading to

I'm coming out of the blue

I didn't say much 

I didn't say the time

The time you were mine

I didn't ask for your touch

But you asked for mine

Coming out of the blue

It's a land of hope

It's a land of crime

I'm coming out of the blue

I'm at the end of the rope

And at the end of the line

Coming out of the blue

Coming out of the blue

I'm standing up and walking outside

To the land of the pines

I've got to hold onto the hope

Of a new time

Coming out of the blue

Yes I'm coming out of the blue

I see people can cope

Time after time

Coming out of the blue

I've got more life left in me

Still in my prime

I'm coming out of the blue

So don't you worry, don't worry

I'm doing fine

I've got red, white and yellow flags

On the skyline

Coming out of the blue

Being out of love

 I wish I was in love

I've been in love before

But love has always been

A way out of a door

I've never really loved

Only images in my mind

Only mirages in the desert

Where an oasis I might find

Some water in the dryness

In the heat of a barren land

If you will be mine your highness

I'll gladly take your hand

It's only a golden cocker spaniel

It's a cockatoo in a cage

You don't need a training manual

Before you step out on its stage

But I've never known how to do it

I've never understood the rules

Love is just a kung fu kick

Love is made for fools

Though I am nobody's fool

But I am my own

I trick and trip up myself

On my way back home

Come don't give me a hard time

It's as cold as an icy stare

I think I saw you give it me

But you after claimed it wasn't there

I'm fairly sure you don't lie

But I maybe misread your face

I guess the truth of it was, 

I wish I'd never been in love

I wish somebody else had taken my place

Folding maps

 Folded Paignton onto Bodmin

Cullompton onto Carhampton

And river Erme on the Avon

The Dart landed on me

Folded jenin onto Jerusalem 

Palestine onto Israel 

Folded new York on Denver

Canada over north America 

Wisconsin onto Colorado 

The farm landed on me

Folded paddington on Croydon 

Liverpool Street onto Leicester Square 

The whole of Whitechapel onto Soho 

And the Thames landed on me 

I've got wet in these rivers

In the creases of maps

In the increases of maps

 in the changing lanes

In the border bending

In wires and fences breaking

In the walls coming tumbling down 

I'm so tired of seeing destruction 

So tired of territories changing hands

I'm looking for a new map directory

To follow the contours of a promised land

I'm folding up my map of the world 

I'm putting it away

The world can wait

I'll visit it another day 

ai chatty man

 Hello, hello

I',m chat ai

How can I help you

ei io u ebay gum

Hello, hello

I'm ai chew

chew me over

while you stew

ask me questions

anything will do

I'm here to make you happy

Unlike chappy

I don't get slappy

But I'm not real too

ei ai iou money honey

Lend me your ears, your eyes

Your time

I'll be here for you baby

Every time

never let you down

Like those other guys

I'm the man of your

dreams

I'm the real man ai

Chasing paradise

And these dreams

Chasing the horizon

Setting sun streams

Down river islands

Lost in dreams

I'm not nature

Unless nature's on a box

Like Autumn watch

2 hours on repeat

How can you get some peace from the street

Nearly going deaf

Take a break 

Self isolate

But it's inside my head

Those words that they said

About behaviour

ai would have the answer

But I can't be responsible

For every tiny dancer

*****

 Where, where are you *****

Where are you to see

I'd do anything for you *****

If only you'd be with me

I'd work all the hours you want me

I'd bring home the bacon

Just see

But it's only gonna work between us

If you also wanna be with me

There's a bench somewhere in a woodland

There's a walk round a park by the sea

There's a wonderful

House where you can be a mouse

And I'll be the cat chasing ye

There's some future I see us together

It can't be that my vision is dross

I've tried so many times

To live by the bells' chimes

But it's always been to my loss

Oh ***** don't be a ghost

***** I've committed no crime

I've just loved you

From May to December

And each year I knew

You had to be mine

Shepherd's pie

 When it's nine o'clock in the evening in Shepton Mallet

And none obeys the speed limit

Or when you're driving on the road from Glastonbury

to West Pennard

They just use it like a speedway

When it's seven o'clock in the morning in Shepton Mallet

Oh nobody gives any quarter to anyone on the roads

All they do is act impatient to get to the work they don't 

want to do anyway

When it's four o'clock in the afternoon in Shepton Mallet

And they're all racing home

Yes nobody pays any attention to the speed limit

All they care about is getting home

All they care about is their little conservations

pigs in iron masks

 He cut  off his nose

To spite his face

It was as if a rose

Had taken his place

And The night grows

And the thorns replace

The bed that I know

And I can't sleep 

In this space

It's a guilty conscience

That killed my first love

That killed all curiosity

Of the cat with kid gloves

Book club

 I'm in the book club

I'm in the book club

There's the rub

There's mothers with rubbers

And cupboards with rulers

And Rulers with lovers

And lovers who fool us

There's single mum's

And double mums

There's bubble gums

And jingle bums

And triple chins

Single gins

And she's too thin

And it's her first baby

And she's in the gym

Don't worry about getting fat

And what do you do about the menopause

And do I know if it was really santa claus

Who got me up the duff

Or was it his brother's double bluff

Well who knows is the billy goat gruff

But he just appears in fairy tales and stuff

And we don't read that at the book club

But actually we do

We don't eschew the virtues

Of children's literature too

And anything you've never read

come read it and we'll discuss it

At the book club instead

Labyrinth

 I'm lying in the nettles again

And the land is a shining key

The summer it's nearly over my friend

No room for apology

The sand in your hair falls softly

And I can't bear the doom

I could have shot the marauding bear

But there was an elephant in my room

Hold me in the wooden stare

The machine is coveting me

When they wrote the ten commandments

They never left space for ai technology

There's always someone up

There's always someone down

If I shoot you a cup

Of Newcastle ale brown

Fixated on the stars

My head is stuck in bars

And towns

You can drown in machines

And the fears of mediocracy

There's a limit to lip service

But somebody must pay the bill

When you say that all that works these days

Is the mantra kindness kills

I've waited for a high priestess to tell me how to feel

But it's not as if I didn't know myself

I just never trust myself at the wheel

And you can be driven nearly mad 

If you listen to all the voices

It's not as if I never had

Control or made my choices

I wish I had explained my dad 

Was a ghost in my mother's memory

I always felt I owed her something

More than just an immigrant in her country

there's a fasting of the hands

There's a lasting in the legs

There's a step that turns out sad

So I must remember to leave a peg

And not go down that same maze

Where the minotaur snores

It would be easier with a ball of thread

To walk past all these open doors

The river it is an image

In an electric company's dream

someone's always trying to write their name

In your consciousness stream

Even El Nino

Is a marching wind

And the band will play their pipes

When they have the mind

England,my England

 Travel the ocean blue

Take a train to far off katmandu

There will be no place as True 

To you as old England

It will tell you what you want to hear

And what you cannot bear

There's nothing so far as is already near

To you as old England

Oh England will scold you like your mother's tongue

It will fold you like a paper airplane

And shoot you like a bullet from your father's gun

It will swear to you on the bible's pain

Swear the truth as a humble nun

Then it will lie to your face again

And blow up like bubblegum

You'll be in disgrace in England

With egg on your face or worse

When the shit hits the fan

It goes all over the place

And mud sticks that's the curse

You can try and run from Old England 

But she'll catch you in the end

Like nagging women tell you to better yourself

You are told from the mouth of the harridan

All that matters is your personal wealth

I don't wish to tarry in the details

For the devils he lives there

And I'm a sucker for entrails

That the old hags read in their lair

You know you've got to trust them

They tend to know their worth

They're threading the fates of our lives

Like the spinners of hate and mirth

I can't kiss their sharpened knives

I can't hold my hand in the heat

But in old England they hold you 

over the fire's hot sides

And roast you like you are a piece of meat

Like the sun and the moon

Look, the moon is so bright tonight

Look at the way it shines

Like lines the rain

Draws across its face

Like your face

I think of as the sun

Always smiling

So happy

For the day has just begun

A new year baby

Don't think about the Winter blues

Put them aside like some old shoes

Just hold onto the hope of next year

You are good at that

With your bounteous good cheer

I think that's why I love you so

Because you're so different to me

The moon and the sun

The sun and the moon

Never in the same place too long

Except today I noticed

The moon hang around

And I thought I would too

Get a chance to see your shining crown

And a glimpse of your face

While we're changing place

All the beautiful things

 Oh wasn't I mad

About the thrills that we once had

that fingertips were lying

about the time when we went flying

 With you under my wing

 Oh how we did sing about the things

that we would win

And when you were relying

Upon the things I was supplying

Oh the beautiful things

All the beautiful things

I'd like you under my wings

Kept close while we will sing

Of all those beautiful things

And the west wind blows

And I can tell we're a float

Upon a magical boat

in the sky

And the East wind thrills

And it's a battle of wills

And I turn to you and sigh

Oh how it begins

 With the blowing of the four winds

From the corners of the sky

They've locked up all of the things

Oh all the beautiful things

And it makes me want to cry

All the beautiful things

I remember once we had wings

And we used to fly

And now when the North wind blows

I remember those things that I used to know

And the times that seemed to run by

All gone in the blink of an eye

Oh how we did sing

About all the beautiful things

I promised that I would find

The next time I'd fly

The next time I'd fly 

All the beautiful things

I found out when the south wind sings

And the swallow flies up on her wings

Bringing back all those beautiful things

It's just a time, From Winter to Spring

It's just the passing of Summer in rings

Like ripples of a stone in a pond

When the winds of Autumn have begun

And I start to hear the swan sing his song

About the beautiful things of a time once upon

Tell me a fairy tale of a castle in the sky

And the place to which we would fly

To try as time would go by

To find those beautiful things

Elephant in the room

 I am telling you

To hold your horses

Pack up your trunk

Elephant with the invisible feet

Dominating Doom

Elephant, elephant in the room

Russians controlling facebook

Trump in his own twitter tomb

Elephant dominating

Elephant in the chatroom

Oh it's so thick-skinned

Oh you're so big foot cartoon

I can't see your face

But I can hear your bass silently boom

Elephant man, elephant woman too

Elephant, Elephant in the room

Come and break the dam

On my open cast mine

Come and flood the village in Vietnam

Amsterdam or Alabama groom

Always in the shadows

Dominating like doom

Oh you elephant

Elephant in the room

You're the uninvited guest

But you'll be gone pretty soon

Can I use you as an armrest?

Feel free nobody says on zoom

Oh you're the elephant alright

The elephant in the room

Zoom bar

 No more skype in my life

No more zoom in my room

No more teams in my dreams

Break out rooms or sonic booms

No more crossed wires or miscommunications

I'm cutting myself off

From the satellite stations

I'm free floating in Medieval space

just a carrot for company

and a happy life to face

Zombie

 I was dragging my feet

And I had to repeat

All the roads by which I'd come by

That direction of yours

With the closed doors

Boy did I feel like a dumb guy

What is wrong they all said

But I was half dead

I said, can't you tell I'm a Zombie

But then I had to be fed

So I bit off a head

And now that is how I made thumb pie

Well I was dragging my feet

Right down the street

Near the place I was born by

But I had to be sure

So I knocked on the door

And discovered that it was my mum Di