After death

 After a near encounter with death

It felt like slipping into a dark hole

A pit of an endless fall

The fear of losing life,

Losing self-control

I see the sun on the brick wall

And it is beautiful

As I remember when I was a child

In an orchard

Just lying on the grass

Doing nothing at all

We are so lucky to live in this world

The willow grows, reaches to the sun

And I breathe, free air

Where the body is trusted

And I think what sin it's been

That I ever lacked self care

I want the sun forever

And I don't want to lose myself in the moon

I want the sun's goodness to guide me

I want to visit the sea

And ask her to hold me there

I want to stay in bed and admire the sun on the bricks on the wall

Opposite my room on the street of Saint Paul

Broken mass

 King Midas sat on the toilet

Turning his shit into gold

Just gold bricking it, shitting it out

Until that toilet got sold

And you're like some shit alchemist

Who turns my gold into lead

To whom I bring my desire and you insist

That I take it elsewhere instead

And yet you hold up your fire

As if a beacon to guide me home

And I rise ever higher and higher

Only to always come down alone

So what is the point to this dichotomy

One in which you only give out vasectomy

And leave my dead flowers to rot til eternity

Comes round or hell freezes over

I'm cutting off now before I'm run over

I'm already a burn victim in the vice of the system

I'm as undisciplined as my rhyme scheme

I'm holding aloft my flag of surrender

Saying I can't take it anymore

Just leave me alone on my own private shore

This is the end of our un-alchemical amore