Island sliding

 D7The problem is C you're attached to someone G else

D7 If we lived on an island C nothing would matter

To G ourselves

D7           Am          Em

Ebdim      

D7 But we live in a world G where we see other people D everyday

D7 And you know what they say about C other people?

G What do they say?

D7 Well they will C say whatever they G say

D7 Let's live in a world C by ourselves, G Just for today

D7 I think we can do it, C Now what do you G say?

D7 If I knew you and C you, you knew G me

D7 Well I know you, and C you, you know G me

Am Em

D7We can do this thing and C make it work out G today

So come with me now, now what do you say?

Brexmas

 I saw Jesus coming on a donkey

I saw a little boy and a monkey

I saw a felicitous cat

But I'm keeping that under my hat

I saw a fat man wearing red

He had a big hat on his head

And it was just like the Sermon said

But I'm keeping it under wraps

Don't leave it out in plain view

For you know they're dwindling few

To hold the Christmas vigil

For Santa and his jezebel

Have clubbed the real message to death

Still we're all about restraint

And don't do that it's not safe

That's the British society we breed

And why we're losing our creed

But also we've made laws to stifle

Our own cultural traditions are trifles

And tea with the Vicar, 

hardly happens or it's quicker

Than it ever used to be

Not that I'm C of E

I was brought up a Catholic, that's me

But put me in a box

Or tell me to stop

Well then this isn't the country for me 

The longest day

 Why does the shortest day seem like the longest day?

It just seems so long to me

I don't mean the sunlight

That doesn't matter

I'm talking psychologically

Why when it feels so hard to be

Without light

But we put on light displays

Candles and plays

And laugh and talk with our friends

There's a feeling I don't 

Want it to end

Maybe it's the start of something

so new

Maybe it's the end of the year

Maybe it's the Christmas period becoming

A place of bickering or cheer

Maybe it's an idea

That these false circles

And machinery

Of community

engagements

And structures of

Certainty

Of people you who hate you

In their eyes

Of clique connections

Which are founded on

self lies

And lonely women

Who bully and cajole

Simply because

They lack any control

Over their own lives

So they stare like cats with knives

Over and beyond you

Because they don't respond to you

Because really they are jealous

And your single fate offends them

Or reminds them

Of their own emptiness and hate

But love is the only answer

To their sparse disaster

of a life

Rainbow song

 You can't have the rainbow without the rain

You can't have love without some kind of pain

No, you can't have the rainbow without the rain

It's got to be a sunny day for you and me

Just waiting for it to break through the old bare tree

Oh winter is a gloomy, gloomy time of year

But you can't have the sadness without some kind of cheer

You can't have the rainbow without some kind of  rain

You can't have tomorrow without memory lane

You need some sorrow before you get pleasure again

You can't have the rainbow without some kind of  rain

The spring time is coming round, yes soon it'll be it's turn

And we'll be dancing merrily as we watch the greens just burn

And all the fish of the see who don't know what's going on

Above the land is changing mysteriously and they swim on and on

You can't have the rainbow without some kind of  rain

You can't have love, my dear, without some kind of pain

You've got to accept it in good cheer and love the sweet times again

You can't have the rainbow without some kind of  rain

Yes, I saw you only yesterday, but I think of you today

Why can't it be the same as it was when our lives were lived at play?

We had so many tomorrows waiting in our way

You can't have the rainbow, you can't have tomorrow

Without a hard time today

So I hope for all our sakes that you'll come back and stay

It will all be to borrow, for tomorrow from today

Cos sometimes you owe a debt and other times you get paid

You can't have the rainbow without some kind of  rain

You can't have the rainbow without some kind of rain

The mistletoe on the vine

 Oh the stars are cracking in the sky

And the starlings are on the line

The apple trees give up their leaves

For their mistletoe on the vine

I say hello to the crow

I say hi to the pigeon

And the fellow in rags

With the homeless mags

Still the mistletoe grows on the vine

I see the snow

And the winter throws

The warmth and mold wine

But I've nowhere to go

And the starlings stow

Near the mistletoe on the vine

Keep me warm oh Jesus do

The sorrow of the hedgerow is mine

But it's all a glow, the holly tree grows

Like the mistletoe on the vine

Just in time deliveries, Uber politics app

 tintinnabulations

 and contraindications

of Asbestos poisonings

from the ivy on the wall

Thunder on April Fools

Current runners running Affairs

Who's the fairest of them all?

Look in the mirror of Spice girl hall

You can't catch me I'm the gingerbread man

Pan headed Pan of chocolate mousse Dan

Roll up your sleeves give it some elbow grease

More thrifty Forbes and Fergie, the dead beat lay loose

Blasted by royal trumpets

Tearing out strawberries from last year's crop

fissiparity irregularity

And uncertain congeniality

Especially Asparagus conspiratorial 

Of the Auspicious moon

And she's a Sarah Palin of the moment

Can tell you all about the politics 

Of the liberal agenda and its moves

Against the Maga movement

But for all her talk she's never done a blind thing

About it, so is really just as culpable 

As the rest of us for our doom

Yet if you see the starfish she will lose an arm or two

But continue to grow

In ever spreading fingers through the rock pool

And other's just eat their mothers and brothers

But we've moved on from that all

Haven't we?

Or are we still struggling out of the sea?

Christmas in a nutshell

 Well I tried to crack my walnuts

I tried to eat my cashews

But the fact of the matter man

Is while I try to eschew

My worldly responsibilities

Of academia mediocrities

My macadamia Aristoteles

Was shooing away a squirrel

Keep your Christmas platitudes

I've got my attitudes

You could give me some latitude

But of course you already do

Perhaps it's unresolved trauma

Of some bedroom Nessun dorma

But swap my Nissan for a Korma

And my Kingdom for a horse or two

I've definitely suffered slings and arrows

But unlike Hamlet, I took to wheelbarrows

Less dramatic one could say than murder

Probably more phlegmatic

Easily a more cowardly act it

is it to be a herder than a murderer

Yet we can't all be Shakespeare's Hamlet

 We can't all die on our swords

As Yul Brynner says in the Magnificent Seven

A coward dies a thousand times

A hero only once

Perhaps that's a choice I make

Perhaps I need some more Christmas nuts