COVID 14 -The School Teacher

They've sent us all home oh what am I to do
My lovely students - and none of them had the flu
Some of them the young ones they were crying,
As I waved good bye to them my hanky flying
That's it for the term here at school-the year is over
Now we have to see how we can teach them online
Talk about sickness cover
It makes more sense to just send them on holiday
An enforced kind of prison break
Where they are held captive at home for 8 weeks
By their parents
But that won't happen it is too severe
But maybe extreme circumstances call for extreme measures
For the young ones the parents will have to be the teachers
I can't see it working, not long term after a couple of weeks
They will be pulling their hair out

Then there are the older ones who will be taking their exams, they are gone for good
And how will they revise, on what, and what support
Most of my teachers are not fully tech-savvy they will have to
learn to be online that's all
Its just a completely different kettle of fish
Half the time you can't see the students
Then they can't hear you
The annoying ones turn off their cameras right on cue
When you begin to ask them a question
And the teenagers are just shy
To speak in front of a teacher one to one or in front of others
Takes boldness, but they can try

You see and then you have the factor that they must show their homes
And they do not feel comfortable sharing that with others
Except over the phone
And what about the ones who have poor family relations
They are trapped at home, with little social consolation
I think this high lights the strengths of the internet age
And its failings
We have these institutions and they are more than places of education
For many troubled souls they are sanctuaries
Places of social support and community away from
A domestic disturbance, and now they can't get away
And the internet is no place to be searching for an escape
In certain situations
So we will do our best us teachers
Keep buggering on as Churchill said
Now we must practice what he preaches

COVID 13- homeless man

I am a homeless man I get no news
But someone told me the PM said to stay home
So I am amused,
I've got no home to begin with man
Self-isolate?
I've already tried it, for more years than I would care to remember
Or can
No I'm a homeless man the street is my home,
Or forest near the gritty city,
Where I can look down on all that pretty sight
I'm a king in my arborial home
On my tree stump home in a little grotto of vines
On the side of the hill is where I reside

Oh but my brothers they bother me, they say come to my church return inside
But I'm afraid, so afraid of being indoors
What the virus has no worse fate for me than the claustrophobic clause
I sign no rental agreement
I'm beholden unto no man
The shop doorways are my bedsteads
And since they are all closed
I'm free to lie in peacefully
Without the morning drone of traffic or some shop keeper
With a broom sweeping me onto the pavement

The only thing you have to be worried about is the cops though
Since they made it illegal to be homeless, I became a criminal overnight
Still the food banks are still open
Or so I thought, when I went down there yesterday there was nought,
Panic buying the kind lady says,
There's not enough supplies in the supermarket
And no body can afford to give
So you see that is life on the thin end of the wedge
But I don't know what else I'll do, its a way of life
This living on a knife edge

COVID12 - The Politician

You see mine is a fine line that one must tread
A little too stern, and you're dead
Public assassination
A little too soft, and you're kicked off the stage
To jeers of rage,
And then it's resignation
Yes its a hard life this Political calling

And 24 hours is a long time in politics especially in the middle of
A covid crisis, its a pandemic, for Jesus' sake,
Ok it was only an epidemic last week
We made a mistake, which governments are entitled to do - I think?
We have the best brains in epidemiology working on it at the moment
And we must time it just right, taking many factors into consideration
It was the boffins and egg heads who came up with these guidelines
I own them, alright yes, I take responsibility for the death toll
20000 lives, that's the prediction, but bloody hell who knows
Here or there a few souls slip through the net, that is wastage
Yes, yes, the are not just number or figures, they are real human beings,
Yes, and who will pay my taxes if you all shuffle off your coils?

So this is my line keep calm and carry on, we need to keep the country going
We can't just ground to a halt, stiff upper lip, suffer the assault
Like the beaches at Normandy - Oh no Dunkirk- no that was a withdrawal
Well you know same thing haul up the draw bridges, we're on our own
Great British Fighting spirit -do it for the Queen

Queen - What! I'm thinking of moving to Canada with Harry and Megan
They seem to know what in the hell they are doing - the only ones I feel PM, Hmm?!

PM - Quite right Your Majesty
Anyway its 24 hours later here are my Policy changes
Everyone must stay in doors
Damn we should have done this last Sunday cough, cough
Excuse me PM we didn't catch that was it an apology?
No, no I was just clearing my throat, got a little tickle you know
Blasted press conferences - journalists always trying to run the show
Well not on my watch!
So what about schools PM?
What about 'em Barry, hmm, no Tony no Giles, no Jim, yes Jim
Old Jim Bob of the Guardian!
Well, my, we go back a long way - ....sorry , yes right Schools!
Do we close them?
Yes right we must close the schools, all children to stay at home with their parents
But they still have to work PM
Right well why can't the grand parents look after them?
But they are in the vulnerable age category in self-isolation!
Right well you are splitting hairs now, do you want to catch this blasted virus or something?
Just get on with it - oh and Police are now empowered to use more draconian methods
We can fine you or arrest you for breaking the curfew
What about the Prisoners?
Well half of the prisoners will be set free to make room for all the members of the public who
Will be breaking the curfew in the coming weeks
So our streets will be a lot safer
Hey we might even draft in some of those released criminals to become a sort of back up special
forces team to back up the regular officers on the beat
Sounds like a marvellous plan

Anyway good night everybody, I'm feeling a little poorly
And think I will need to self isolate now
As you should to - everybody Bog Off and go home!

COVID 11 -The doctor

I am a doctor doing my rounds
On the Corona virus ground
In the infectious diseases ward
Its early morning when I get there
I smile and say hello to the cleaner
They have been keeping hygiene at a premium
I ask her are you afraid at all,
She leans against a wall
And says I have a job to do its all the same
We are all in this together, the managers can deal
With every eventuality
Then she just picks up her mop, gets on with her job,
And then she stops, and says I mean, I do this for my family

I walk into the staff room where the nurses are chatting
There is a buzz of excitement as they hear the news
There is another announcement, by the Minister for Health
In the government
We are going to give the NHS all the help it needs, he says
What with the ventilators, the face masks, we are facilitators
We're going to curb the impact on hospitals
Yes there will be a rise in cases, its up two hundred two days later
Now everyone must stay in side

The staff they all look hopeful, and they think
The ward will cope when full, but remember days
Under foreign skies, and the jubilance will be gone
I predict in two weeks to come, by which time
We will be believe no more politicians lies

Already the hospital has ordered masks from the government
And ventilators are being put on trial,
But I have little faith in official promises
I need real world solutions, if they are going to bring them
Let it be now
Already patients are dying, and carriers are crying
Our nurses are fighting on the frontline
And where is their protection
Ok we are used to working with infection
But we see the most severe cases then go back to our home lives
Where our partners are home looking after the children
Because they are off from school
But I don't know if I'm infecting them all
Just the same
There needs to be more rigorous testing
And for people to keep in isolation
Only then it seems we will stand a chance to stay alive

While I wash my hands I count the seconds sing the song twice - Happy Birthday
Well I prefer Gloria Gaynor's version I will survive

COVID 10 - The Child

I am a kid and I'm staying indoors
I'm gonna leap on the furniture and slide on the floors
I will climb up the curtains and scale my bunk
And eat what I like while I watch any old junk
On television screens that make my eyes bulge
Like my sister and brother we're going to indulge
Oh the pleasures of life when you're away from school
I imagined I might live without any rule
But with my father I fight, and with my brother I brawl
And my sister shows me spite, while my mother she is cruel
Oh what have I done to deserve a family like these
I'd rather take flight be on a ship on rough seas
There is one for your money, and two for your looks
And I can get no honey with my head buried in books
But I can't go out, no I don't meet my friends
And its a longtime to stay stout, when will these tortures end?

COVID 9 - MAN and WOMAN

COVID man versus COVID woman
Man:
Who knew? Men like to risk it for a biscuit
I do too, yes I will run, so should you
We have a god-given right to exercise
Despite any curfew
Stay in your homes they say, hooray!
Well that is fine if you're a woman
You are used to these home comforts
Us men should be out in the open
You know getting our fill of Nature's bill
Hunting and killing the lion
Putting food on the table,
No, never mind the label
I don't mean we like going shopping
I mean we are the Bread winners aren't we?
We must make pay dirt, we have to fill
Our pipes and get started upholding the economy
If we stop so does the industry
And there are not enough in reserves to kick start it
So better be smart kid, keep going out in it
Come rain or hail or government brutality

But I mean come on we are all afraid are n't we?
It takes a man to admit that honestly
But what do you expect of me, give up just quit?
Why should I listen to their Authority!

Woman:
Why must you always try to break the rules?
If half the people in the country acted like you
There'd be no separation no one would stay in doors
And the virus would spread more and more
Why must you always push the boundaries
You want to be told off or reprimanded?
You Want to go to prison or pay a hefty fine?
Then carry on with your running, it is organized crime

You know I heard on the Radio more men than women die of COVID
It is the case that women have better immunology, they have two XXs see
In their chromosomes it is clear in our DNA
Where as men are XY it means they go astray
Its like they are right only half the time
The rest of the time they are just asking Why?
Why Y? Why X? It all is a mess, all I know is
Its in our biology - women therefore, without doubt, furthermore
Are right all of the time!

MAN:
Ah slight correction - where would women be without men?
Stuck in a cave somewhere still eating berries! There's no
hunter spirit, killer instinct that a man has for innovation
He left his cave to hunt it took him all the way to the moon
That is why it was one Giant leap for Mankind


WOMAN: Oh you are insufferable! What do you think would have happened to the children
While the man was out playing the hero, if the woman did not clothe and feed them?
Their berries nuts and fruit provided most of the essential nutrients
Without women humanity wouldn't have gone anywhere - forget the moon
They would n't have made it passed the camp fire!
And have you never heard necessity is the 'Mother of Invention' not the Father!
Making do when you have ought, that is what it is all about

And what about this after this crisis is over - there will be fewer men in the country,
So who do think will be running things then hey?
Yes that's right - THE WOMEN!

COVID 8 -The Old Woman

I am an old woman now,
I know I don't have long to live,
I've been walking up this cobbled road
All my life, I even feel like I am one of these cobbles
Rounded and worn down by life and its wheels
Worn to a shine, down to my essence
But still hard
Yet this thing that comes on the wind makes me afraid
Makes others like me too,
People I have known all my life cross over to avoid me,
And I feel cold now and alone
I draw my shawl up over my head and face to conceal my mouth
Only my eyes see out
Oh in my eyes I could be young, I have hope and joy at life
My life is worth no less than theirs because they are young
I still cling to life, or perhaps it clings to me
This Corona Virus is not the worst thing I have seen
I've lived through the war
Humanity has been through tough times
And it will come through, though
Not everyone will make it
I doubt I shall, but I cling on

It is ten in the morning and I am making my way out
To do my shopping in a small town on the outskirts of Rome
You used hear the buzz and hum of the city machinery cars and all sorts
Going on, this was rush hour, busy business time
Now it is just us old foggies who are allowed out to do our shopping

I go in the shop with some trepidation,
The shop assistants turn around masks cover their visages, like some muslim women I think concealing their beauty, just their eyes, but they are welcoming enough, a little haggard in their carriage perhaps
Just then an old man brushes against me, out of the way he says
No manners I think, but then I notice they are all at it reaching up here there and everywhere
for to grab and buy, the shelves are clearing out
I try not to panic - stay calm I tell myself, just breath and walk,
I slowly advance trying my best to avoid the crazy actions of other customers,
An old woman is freaking out screaming at her husband to get this and that and hurry up about it

Half an hour later I stagger out of the swelter, of moist breath
Warm shop atmosphere
And breathe clear air, fresh air, I don't know
But I am on my own now
At last, squirrel scurries up into a tree
Self-isolating too? Nature has that down to a T
But what of me? I give a little cough
A bystander takes a side step away
And I can't feel sorry for myself
I'm too old for that I say, almost out loud
I walk on along the cobbled road
Pass the one way sign
That says wrong way
Turn back